A lesson alot could learn from. We all know that stress is not good for our body nor is worrying. But sometimes its unavoidable But sometimes we take on more than we can handle. i have always been a people pleaser. Which if you have never been one then you wont understand the toil it can take on you. Over the course of the last ten years I have even allowed myself to take more overloads. Here lately I have been dealing with alot. A death of my dad, a cheating husband, being left stuck with thousands of dollars of bills not to mention a house payment. A van that needs work on a house that needs work on alot. Part hurts and emotioins that I am trying to heal from. I tend o take on more than my nerves can handle. I do things for people when I dont feel like doing them. I dont do things i want to do for the sake of it being an inconvifnce to others. When things are wrong i just keep my mouth shut. i do things that others should be doing but do them just get get them done and for the sake of arguement. Be it on the home front or at work or in my personal life. I have been sick with bronchitus for a week now. I suffer from anxiety attacks. Usually I can keep them under control and dont even take anything for it. I have trained myself to control it an not let it control me. Well last night I went into a full blown panic attack. one to which I thought I was not going to come back from. Now you take someone that is already sick an congested an cant walk without getting out of breath an throw in one of those attacks. I could not breath at all my chest was pounding i was wheezing an dizzy and sick to my stomach and numb all over. For the first time in over three months I had to break down an take a Lorazapham. I felt like such I failure to even have to take one because I knew it was controling me. Within an hour I was calm and breath was normal. i realized that my stress and anxiety which has been acting up has played a role in making this bronchitur hard to get over. Some things are about to change. Not to make anybody made or not to seem like I dont care. But for my health and my well being and my sanity. And those who care about me will understand and support me all the way.
Posted on: Wed, 11 Sep 2013 17:40:00 +0000
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