As I sat here today thinking about Lee Buckley who passed away yesterday, I could only think about memories and sadness. Then I thought about IF ONLY I would have... You see, so many of us pass on opportunities to say how we feel about someone without thinking about the impression or the difference it could make in their lives. We take things for granted and never stop to realize the impact we could make on someone even to make them smile or feel good about themselves if only for a fleeting moment. I remember sitting on the back of Lees car one day out at a certain parking lot in Cambridge. He was drumming as he always did and I decided to walk over and just shoot the shit. As I sat there talking to him, I was overcome with warmth and comfort. I couldnt understand why until I realized that Lee himself, made me feel that way. I was astounded at his calm and friendly approach, his demeanor was that of a saint and his caring heart was so obvious. Yet I sat there talking to him and failed to share those thoughts with him. Why? I mean he could have thought I was a freak, but he also would have had those words to make him feel as special as he really was. I knew at the time that it was only a matter of time for him as he was suffering from a brutal terminal disease, but after the conversation I walked away and never had the chance to tell Lee just how amazing I thought he was. You see, since I marched in Royalaires with him I had the utmost respect and I was only 16, I hung out with his then girlfriend Lynn and Trudy and I thought how great he was to Lynn was commendable. But never said a word to him while seated on his car chatting in the parking lot. I also remember in 1999 or 2000 I was with the Expressions of North Star Winter Guard and we were asked to march the Guelph Santa Claus parade with Royalaires as their colour guard.... I chose to play cymbals because they needed one and I was Lees Cymbal player, I got to hold those monsters out in front of him and walk backwards while he banged on them and I remember thinking how strange it was that this many years later and I looking in the eyes of an amazing drummer that I only knew from my drum corps experience...one I had respected as a kid. Then to see him again when I went to Scout House and in wonderment was amazed that he was still participating and that how lucky they were to have him. He wasnt my idol in any way, he was just a guy, a great guy a calm, friendly, caring, smart, talented and wonderful man. I could only wish that I could be known like he is. His presence alone made everything okay, you know what I mean? He marched the 2013 season and never missed a beat even though he was ill and at times Im sure he was weak. But he was always there, ready to do what he came to do without question or self pity. He was still the drum corps Lee we all knew and loved. When I sat there on that back hatch of his car with him, I would have loved to share those memories with him and my thoughts but alas, I didnt. Lee was also one of the RIFLE LINES biggest fans this past summer, and I remember Lou Ferrigno always telling me that Lee was asking about us and was hoping to see us spinning in front of the Scout House... I was so pleased to hear that Lee was asking about us, that he cared. We went to play for Lee in his Back Yard this summer and surprised him (which was amazing) To see him come out on the back porch with his drumsticks in hand as well was such a joyful moment, but unfortunately we didnt have enough spinners to spin there we did not do it. I regret that now, because my pride would have been to show him what we got. This is why Looking back can be upsetting when we dont do all we could do to leave that impression and respect with someone. And I think this finally brings me to my point... I believe that we could GO at any time and anywhere with or without warning, we are vulnerable to life and to death and we shouldnt ever forget that. We should say what we feel when we want to and do what we can when we can do. Remember, we all have feelings and we all touch someone in our lives in some way shape of form so, we should tell them...we should NOT hold back. We should let someone know how much we think about them and how we feel about them...we should never wait for tomorrow, because quite honestly...tomorrow may never come. I know Lee will see us Spin in The MAGIC of Scout House Winter Guard and he will be proud, I will dedicate every performance to him in his honour, because I know he cared and I want to show him just how much I cared. I will also tell you, my friends that I love and respect each and every one of you so much here and now, so you will never have to wonder. And to my family, I would not want any other Mother or Father or sister or brothers or niece or nephews I love you all more than life itself. I know it sounds as though I have had some regrets throughout this note but I have to say at this point, the only regret I have in this, is that Lee was taken too young and too early... One of the nicest men in Drum Corps that I will never have a chance to share a memory with was taken way too soon. RIP Lee Buckley, I will never forget you and I hope you know that now. ~peace~
Posted on: Mon, 03 Nov 2014 21:38:44 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015