Dear Grace We want to be among the first to congratulate you for landing top position in the womens league. While we know that your motives for seeking the post are sinister and as wicked as the devil himself we give it to you for successfully pulling the rug from the other faction in your party of thieving lunatics. We also think it was a dumb move. But if you however, insist that your motives are neither sinister nor dumb you can prove us wrong by passing a simple test. If you pass this test we promise to rally behind your cause. We further promise to pursuade Baba Jukwa to abandon his Preez263 Jonathan Moyo for president 2018 election campaign and tell him to also rally behind you. Remember we are Jukwas Sahwira and he may listen to us. But first you must pass our test. Here is the deal, the background first; The fact that you finally decided to bury your hatchet with Oppah and form an alliance of convenience is our starting point. We know you had a long standing fued with Oppah. We also know why. It is known that your husband used to sample Oppahs pleasure tunnel during and after the war, before his joy stick became a mopani worm due to sickness and old age. So we understand why you have reconciled. You both have nothing to fight for now. Women like you cant be seen fighting over a useless mopani worm. But our issue here, which forms the basis of our test, is the alliance you have forged with your former rival. If both this alliance and your entry into politics are for genuine reasons you must prove it by living up to the words uttered by your new-found ally at your endorsement by the youths yesterday. In case you have forgotten here is what Oppah said; Mukaona ndasvikawo ne Womens League kuti kwete nguva yasvika iyi zvakutoda Mai kuti vaone zvaita musangano mbavha dzakaitwa nursed na President dzakaba mapurazi dzanakirwa zvino dzave nematumbu akadai, ma diamonds ma mines zvese nemapurazi varikutora vachipa vana vavo, vave kuda zvino kuti dai President vachibva vachengete loot yavo. Now, we know that Obert Mpofu your husbands obedient son was one of the first people to endorse your appointment, if we can call it that. All Zimbabweans also know that Fat Obert is one of the most corrupt ministers on the planet and that he aptly fits the description given by Oppah above. Since you promised, in your acceptance speech, to deal with corruption we challenge you to deal with Fat Obert. This is your only test. Pass this test and everyone here including Baba Jukwa will be fully behind you. We will forget all your fornication shenanigans and give you a clean slate. Last but certainly not least, we have a message for you from the admin panel here at Zimbabweans For Prosperity. Please tell your goons to stop threatening us with useless comments on this page. We will only stop writing about you when you vacate State House. In any case you have to catch us first. Jukwa was telling us how useless your hackers are. We know he is laughing right now. We wish you happy hunting. Yours, Until you vacate State House, Zimbabweans For Prosperity.
Posted on: Fri, 08 Aug 2014 18:26:50 +0000
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