#HOLY_WEEK Verbal abuse uses words as grenades—designed to - TopicsExpress


#HOLY_WEEK Verbal abuse uses words as grenades—designed to punish the other person, to place blame, or to justify actions—it’s a poisonous putdown that one spouse uses to make the other feel bad, appear wrong or inadequate. The book of Proverbs is filled with warnings against unleashing poisonous words: “Do you see a man who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than for him” (29:20); “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control” (29:11); “The tongue has the power of life and death” (18:21). Clearly the Bible warns against verbal abuse. Don’t give in. We must never allow verbal abuse “to work” for the abuser. Giving in encourages that negative behaviour to continue. If you recognise this in your relationship, you might say, “I realize I’ve encouraged your verbal outbursts by caving in. I understand now that this is wrong. In the future I will no longer be responsive when you lash out. If you want something, ask nicely, and I may well do what you desire. But I won’t give in when you rant and rave.” Does the above approach guarantee your spouse will eliminate the abusive behavior? No. We can’t determine peopler’s choices. We can, however, be responsible even when our partner is being irresponsible. Retaliation (fighting fire with fire), capitulation (giving up and becoming a doormat), and denial (acting as though nothing is wrong) are all common responses to verbal abuse. None of them, however, are Christian responses. The Christian response is loving confrontation. “If someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted” (Galatians 6:1). #Lunacy
Posted on: Wed, 16 Apr 2014 12:51:46 +0000

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