I think it is about time to untie myself from the anchors that have been holding me in one place for far to long now. I originally locked myself to this place, to these people, and to these things thinking that I would grow with them and be a big part of there lives. I see now that it is not what I thought it would be. This city is not changing or growing, those people barely talk to me now, and the things around me are nothing more than distractions that keep me from seeing what I see right now. My arms cannot reach out any farther, my voice cannot yell any louder, and my heart cannot be separated into so many peaces that everyone has a piece. My arms will now be used for my climb back up from where I have fallen, my voice will be used for those who want to talk to me as well as do so, and my heart will be pieced and sown back together so I can give it to that one special person. Till then it will remain with me and only those I allow will be let in to it. I have no room in my life, in my heart, or in my arms for those of you who do not care enough for me as I do you. I have fallen so far.. I have lost my job, had my car stolen, body injuries, friends abandon me, and now even on the verge of losing the very place I call home. No more! I cannot live for you if I cannot live for me! I have but one life to live and I tend on living it for me. HOW I WANT, WITH WHOM I WANT, AND WHERE I WANT! I no longer think I can change the world from one place. It is impossible to do that because the world is so large. But I will be damned if I am going to let the world change me into some depressed, insecure, locked away person that questions everything and does nothing because they are afraid of failure and afraid of the fall. I look at all those things and say bring it own. If I fall then so be it. I will pick myself up and go right on walking up that hill. You are not going to stop me, your not going to hold me back, and you most certainly are not going to use me.
Posted on: Sat, 13 Jul 2013 01:16:29 +0000
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