Monkeys Dateline, last night, Rifle, Colorado. I was sitting on - TopicsExpress



          

Monkeys Dateline, last night, Rifle, Colorado. I was sitting on the couch with one eye on a spirited game of cellphone Scrabble I was playing with the wife, and the other eye on a re-run of Law and Order. Vincent Donofrio AKA Pooh Bear was running a renegade crew of corrections officers to ground. My two year old son was cuddled up against my rib cage. Hed just had his bath and was laughing huh, huh,huh and gesticulating wildly. I didnt think much of it, hes a happy little guy and that pretty much describes his whole existence to this point. It was my wife who alerted me. Jerimie, he has an erection! Erection, eh? Nope, didnt have the right letters to make that play, I pulled focus from my Scrabbling. Sho nuff, my son was smacking his John Thomas through a semi-protective layer of pajama and diaper. The protocol went something like this, smack, smack, smack, huh,huh,huh. No Catholic I, I didnt wish to give the boy a complex. I find him playing with a electrical socket and I respond with a stern No! then smack his bottom. In this instance, I tried to gently pull his arm away from its labors. The boy would have none of it. He found the golden ticket and was rapidly bearing down on Willy Wonkas factory. Its not a perfect analogy, but there it is. It was a little too early in my sons story arc for the Theres a time and a place, son. And the time isnt 8:15 PM, and the place damn sure aint on the couch in front of the whole family talk. The wheels turned, I said to the boy Who wants fruit snacks? That did it. My son instantly threw his ticket into the street for that Herb, Charlie, to find. Fruit snacks, peoples. Everything else is some bullshit. The boy followed me to the kitchen. They were Curious George fruit snacks which Id just this very afternoon purchased from City Market. Monkeys! My son happily intoned. Monkey s indeed.
Posted on: Fri, 17 Jan 2014 17:31:29 +0000

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