On July 25, 2014 my life was irrevocably and forever changed. I - TopicsExpress



          

On July 25, 2014 my life was irrevocably and forever changed. I miscarried a baby boy at the gestational age of 18 weeks. There is no such thing as an ordinary miscarriage but mine was horrific. I write this post not for sympathy or attention but to share an experience that I found to be much more common than I could ever imagine and to perhaps help someone else, anyone else. My genetically perfect and physically beautiful son literally fell out of my body still attached. (That is as graphic as I’ll get-I promise) It had nothing to do with my age, or any tests we chose to have or not have. I was later diagnosed with what’s known as Incompetent Cervix. I found out 25% of 2nd and 3rd trimester miscarriages are due to this, (helpful information is in the link below). Sadly, this condition is almost always diagnosed after the loss of an infant’s life. There is a procedure I will undergo with my next pregnancy to prevent this from happening again and the success rate is quite good. Yes, somehow there WILL be a next pregnancy and I’m hopeful. Our son’s name was Kingsbury Steven Neaverth, he was 5.5 oz and 19.5 cm long. We had him blessed (and why not? Our lack of faith has nothing to do with our little fella’s soul) and we chose to have him cremated. We have many photos and an amazingly heartbreaking story. If anyone’s interested I will private message you anything at all. I found seeing Kingsbury fascinating and beautiful. I will not be offended by your wanting to see him or not wanting to see him. Kingsbury was a very happy accident with my ex-boyfriend and partner-in-crime (and travel) Steve. We welcomed the pregnancy and Steve was by my side through all of it. We spent 12 hours at Millard Fillmore Suburban with family and friends visiting us and seeing the baby. Steve cried a lot, we held the baby and cried together a lot. We spent 12 hours with Kingsbury and over that time he truly became our son. I don’t know how long we’ll mourn but this week I’m feeling better than last and should you see me, don’t shy away from talking about it, unless it’s uncomfortable for you. Talking about him and acknowledging him helps me heal every single second. Having my most beautiful 16 year old son (who Kingsbury looked JUST like) gave me some peace and love. Liam came to the hospital too and saw his little brother, and for that I thank him with all my
Posted on: Mon, 04 Aug 2014 16:52:41 +0000

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