Opposites attract, so you should date someone who’s nothing like you. But wait a minute, isn’t it important to date someone with a similar background, values and goals? There is so much conflicting advice out there, how can you possibly figure out who to date? Following are seven signs you are dating the right person. Of course, they don’t all have to line up perfectly, but the more aligned you two are, the better the relationship. 1. Temperament: Do you get along well most of the time or find that he/she irritates you on a regular basis? Do you find yourself saying, “If only she’d think before she spoke,” or “I wish he’d be less lazy,”? Is he overly anxious? What you see is what you get, so if you don’t like a lot of what you see, don’t try to fix the other person’s personality. Find someone whose temperament is more compatible with yours. 2. Communication Style: Are you direct or indirect in conveying what’s important to you? Are you passive while she’s assertive? Do you hold things in until you explode or speak your mind clearly and directly? In a good relationship, you communicate your needs to each other on a regular basis. If you can both communicate well and in a similar fashion, you’ll have a much higher chance at a successful relationship. 3. Friends and Family: Do you like and get along with each other’s friends and family? Do you agree about how much time to devote to both? If this is a stressful topic, one that you can’t easily resolve, it will potentially have a very negative effect on your relationship. 4. Nutrition and Fitness: This may seem like a minor point, but think about how many meals you will share with each other. How do your mate’s food choices and attention to fitness align with your lifestyle and values? If you’re not a good match in this arena, you will probably have challenges in your relationship. 5. Financial: Many people say that they are seeking a mate who is financially secure. In today’s volatile financial market, financial security is not something you can count on. A more appropriate question is, are you and your partner united in being responsible with finances. Are you both generous? Do you both contribute to charities? Money is something that couples fight about most often. It is helpful if you share similar financial goals and habits. 6. Education: Couples who share similar backgrounds in education, life and professional experience are better suited for each other. They have more in common and can relate to each other in a deeper way. They are on the same wavelength and truly ‘get’ each other. 7. Intimacy: There are many things that come under the category of intimacy, including romance and public display of affection. Some couples have different s*xual needs, which can lead to anger and resentment. A very essential component of a lasting loving relationship includes having similar ideas about frequency and style of intimacy. So if Mr. “High Libido” and “Ms. Low Libido” meet, that will have some issues in the bedroom. Conclusion: What can you do if you are not compatible? 1. Accept things as they are. 2. Work on yourself and the relationship. 3. Leave the relationship. Remember that the only person you can change is yourself. Your partner will only change if they want to. If you are dating to find a lasting, loving relationship, it is much better to choose a compatible partner now than to try and fix something that is broken later. Don’t be afraid to let go of the wrong person if your basic needs are not met. There are millions of singles in the world. Move on and find a better fit. And make sure to use the most powerful four-letter word in dating: “Next”!
Posted on: Fri, 20 Sep 2013 12:34:08 +0000
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