Today is a bittersweet day for me. You see Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday of the year. The thought of this day brings back many happy memories of childhood. The fire in the fireplace, bringing in wood from outside and smelling the smoke in the air. I remember the guys coming home from hunting and hoping that my brother Tom got a deer...because he would always stick the deers tongue out of its mouth...which always made my mother laugh. I remember Dad carving the turkey and letting me sneak pieces from the other side of the plate. I remember the riced potatoes and the stuffing. I remember my little sister Nancy putting black olives on the ends of all of her fingers and eating them one by one. My Ava does the same thing today. I remember the amazing pies. To this day, nothing has ever compared to my mothers apple pie. (Although Micheles pies come damn close.) I remember my mother getting angry with my father at least 20 times for silly things...and how Dad would try to romance her a little, dancing with her to Christmas songs on the radio. She would always give in and dance with him in the kitchen, while the gravy was thickening on the stove. I remember the incredible noise of the day. Everyone talking at once, laughing, occasionally quarreling. Man...the laughter. I can hear it now and it makes me smile. Our home was packed to the gills with tables big and small, and it seemed impossible that we would have enough for everyone. Yet we had always had more than enough. I remember the pile of coats in the bedrooms and the piles of shoes at the door. I remember yelling our hellos across the room as another family member arrived, and how we would all make our way to give kisses and hugs. Everyone was welcome at my parents house. Boyfriends, girlfriends, friends, coworkers, inlaws, outlaws...if you didnt have a place to go for Thanksgiving, you were welcome at our home. I remember after the meal, and how the girls would all help with the dishes, sometimes singing together and getting angry as we would bring over more plates as they were trying to finish up. I remember my mother today most of all. How she made everything perfect...how she gave us all a version of Thanksgiving that in my rose-colored glasses now seems almost like a Rockwell painting. I feel her loss deeply today. I miss how she corrected and chided my father when he gave away the joke punch line too early, and yet she still laughed as though she was hearing this joke for the first time. I miss the way she would hold my hand in her rough calloused hands, equally comforting and a reminder of how hard she worked to give us a wonderful home. I miss her kisses goodnight and the way she looked in on me late at night as she turned in for the day. I remember so many wonderful things about those days, while the angry and sad moments have lovingly tiptoed from sight and faded from my memory. I miss my family today. I miss Joels stupid jokes and Danielles loud laughter. I miss Mike Garskis goofy stories and how it will take Dawn 2 hours to finish her dinner. I miss watching the little ones running around and playing with the toys that we played with as children. I miss the hellos. I miss the goodbyes. And I miss every moment in between. Even the drama. To my family, I miss you today. I dont say it nearly often enough, but I love you all and I am grateful for the all of the loving memories that make me smile...and perhaps cry a little, this Thanksgiving day. And Mom...although Im guessing you dont use Facebook in heaven, just in case, I miss you today most of all.
Posted on: Thu, 27 Nov 2014 21:30:57 +0000
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