WHAT DID HE MISUSE? The question we get all the time is how to know what consequences to use in a given situation. One of the most effective consequences is to take the freedom of something away from your child. What does this look like? The way this is commonly said is, “The punishment has to fit the crime.” In other words, if your child gets on the computer without asking, taking television privileges away is not sufficient and is not going to be effective. We say it this way: Take away the freedom of what they have misused. The first question your child will ask is, “For how long?” Don’t put a time limit on it if your child is 6 years old and up. Ask him what you need to see in him before he can get that freedom back. Let’s say your son was playing on the computer instead of doing his homework. He loses the freedom of the computer until he is in the habit of getting his homework done before dinner. You need to have an idea of how long he will lose it, you just won’t tell him this. If he is 6 years, we would give it a week and see how it goes. If he is 8 years, we would start with 2 weeks. If he is 10 years, we would be watching him for 3 weeks, and for middle school and high school age, we would start with a month. Remember, “No pain, no gain.” We want him to get into the habit of doing the right thing, not just do it long enough to get the freedom back. Take away the freedom of what your child has misused until he earns the right to have it back. -Taken from “Why Can’t I Get My Kids to Behave? by Joey and Carla Link parentingmadepractical
Posted on: Mon, 21 Oct 2013 07:34:35 +0000
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