Your perspective is what you want it to be. You can see learning opportunities or you can see a defiant child. From a developmental point of view - you cant rush maturity. From a relational view - your influence will be stronger if you get control of yourself. If your child is age 0-5, his or her impulses are not well managed because the thinking brain that allows for planning, forethought and considering others is not fully online. Will you see glimpses of maturity? Yes, absolutely. But self-control is limited at best, nonexistent for most young kids, and a executive function skill that takes years to master. If your child is 6-12, he or she still needs lots of support and practice. Resistance may be telling you that your child doesnt feel heard or respected, or that your child is in need of some skill development or stress-relief. You can force compliance without looking deeper, but your problems and challenges will increase as your child becomes more autonomous. If your children is a teenager, he or she relies on your opinion and recognition of the person s/he is becoming and the thoughts s/he is having. Punishments, judgments and evaluations will ensure that your child does not seek you out for for advice or support. When help hurts - a person will do anything to avoid it. You can try and run your house with demands and threats or you can learn to shift your focus to address the growth challenges in each stage. mamablog.teach-through-love/2014/02/development-takes-time-repetition-relief.html
Posted on: Sun, 29 Jun 2014 00:10:00 +0000
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