------------ The English Language----------------- There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple or pine in pineapple. And while no one knows what is in a hotdog, you can be pretty sure it isnt canine. English muffins were not invented in England nor French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which arent sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write, but fingers dont fing, grocers dont groce, and hammers dont ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isnt the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, two meese? Is cheese the plural of choose? One mouse, 2 mice. One louse, 2 lice. One house, 2 hice? If teachers taught, why didnt preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Why do people recite at a play, and play at a recital? Ship by truck or car and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? How can the weather be hot as heck one day and cold as heck another? When a house burns up, it burns down. You fill in a form by filling it out and an alarm clock goes off by going on. You get in and out of a car, yet you get on and off a bus. When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it? English is a silly language ... it doesnt know if it is coming or going!!!
Posted on: Sat, 26 Apr 2014 16:07:20 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015