10 October 2014. Hey Depression Remember me. You stole my life. You are a Liar, a Con Artist and a Thief. You took my self esteem, my self worth, my values, my goals, love of life, my family. The list could go on and on. Remember when you would hold me responsible for protecting my Mum and siblings when I was only 7 years old and how sick I would get with worry and anxiety - migraines, stomach ache, etc. Remember how at age 13 years you made me feel so bad that I cut myself because I could handle physical pain but not emotional pain. I cried out but no one answered. It was just you and me and I was a failure, worthless, hopeless, and helpless. You made me think that I was here to be used and abused and falling into the pit with you with you was the only answer. Grey and Black were the main colours of my life. You made me attractive to others with problems and told me I was responsible for their wellbeing. When things did not go according to plan, again I was a failure, hopeless and helpless. You have stuffed up my careers, my marriage, my kids, my friendships, my relationship with God and my church, my community work, my health. In fact there is not one area you have not affected. Finally, you brought me to suicide as the only way out. Well as you can see it didnt work. I am alive and well. You just wouldnt stop pushing and I reached rock bottom. You know what rock is good for. It is good for foundations. I am rebuilding my house and guess what? There is no room for you, not even as an occasional guest. I have met people who care, who are not judgemental, who have shared their own stories and successes. They have championed me to success. I have wise counsel, correct medication and have learned new skills and coping strategies. I have learned that you have no power or control over me unless I give it to you. So take a long hard look because this is the last time you and I will communicate. I have taken back the power and control of my life and I have the power of God working with me in this. You lost and I won. Dont even think about coming back. Your time is over and I will kick you if I ever see you around my house again. Good Riddance.
Posted on: Thu, 09 Oct 2014 21:29:21 +0000
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