21. Avoid the First Impulse: Do the Unexpected 22. Refrain from Overprotection An overprotective mother plays the high authority who decides when Johnny is warm and when he is cold... Mother provides services that are not necessary... She sees potential danger lurking everywhere. We cannot protect our children from life. Nor should we want to. We are obligated to train our children in courage and strength to face life... Under the pretext of concern for their welfare, we keep our children helpless and dependent so that we may appear big and powerful and protective... It places us in a superior dominant position and keeps our children submissive. 23. Stimulate Independence Doing for a child what he can do for himself is extremely discouraging, since it deprives him of the opportunity to experience his own strength. It shows our complete lack of faith in his ability, courage and adequacy, robs him of his sense of security, which is based on the realization of his own capacity to meet and solve problems, and denies him his right to develop self-sufficiency - all in order to keep our own image of our indispensability. Wendy has no chance to develop independence as long as Mother is impatient, in a hurry, and takes the easy way out. Without realizing what goes on, we so frequently allow ourselves to continue to help our children long after it is necessary because we are so used to doing so.
Posted on: Sat, 06 Jul 2013 03:04:43 +0000
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