5 YEARS BURIAL ARRANGEMENT!!! If ONLY Nelson Mandela Was a Nigerian? It seems as if South Africans are not so creative? If Mandela was a Nigerian, here are the things that will happen: 1] The corpse will stay in the morgue for 5 years to enable government prepare for befitting burial. 2] Government will set up burial planning committee with power toward contracts to construct new roads leading to Mandelas home town, construction of new airport, importation of bulletproof ambulance that will carry the corpse, construction of new stadium for burial reception, new presidential jet, etc. 3] APC will protest against extravagant waste of public funds. 4) The national Assembly will pass new budget to accommodate burial expenses. 5] There will be a national Aso ebí (uniform) imported from Holland or USA e.t.c which will be made compulsory for every Nigerian to buy, sew and wear or else no employment opportunities. 6] His Obituary will appear on Uche Ogbuagu requesting friends to show respect. 7] During the 5 years of mourning, governors, traditional rulers, students bodies will struggle to book appointments to visit and pay condolence to Mr President. 8] New slangs will emerge, for instance, Yoruba greetings will start, e kú Màdibà o, eku iku Mandela! 9] Our networks will produce newcaller tunes.... to hear Mandelas last breath, press 1, to hear the last word he spoke, press 2,, etc. 10] New products will emerge, eg Madiba zobo drink, Madiba purewater, Madiba magic soap/ cream. 11] What about our musicians? Ahh!!! 5 albums daily in praise of the icon! 12] New born babies will be named after him, names like Madibaseyi (yoruba), Mandelamaka (ibo), Nelsonllahi (hausa), etc 13] Pastors will start seeing vision of how Mandela met them and sent a message to the world through them!!! And what else wont we see or hear? 14] An ex-president will write a 10-page letter to the current president on why Mandelas head should have been better placed. In fact, that ex- presidents name would have been .... *coughs* please i need a cup of cow milk *choking* Even some ladis wil come wit babies to claim inheritance n trust nollywood. D film will come out for sure
Posted on: Mon, 16 Dec 2013 07:01:23 +0000
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