5 months today.... Every time you mark another month I feel like Im going down, it weakens me. Days keep passing and I miss you more and more. YES i know I have to be thankful you are alive, that you are making progress, and that you are finally home. YES I AM, I am EXTREMELY GRATEFUL with Our Lord and Virgin Mary, and all those prayers that continue for your recovery. But that does not change the way I feel towards me missing you! Our long talks, laughs, gossips, dances, hugs, the brother that always had words of confort, scolds, and a shoulder i could cry on. Til this day I think, I question, and still wish these 5 long months could have just been a Loong dream of which I could wake up from and then everything will be ok. I cry myself to sleep waiting on answers, waiting on bigger improvements. Waiting on you. Its been soo hard to just see you sit and lay there and do nothing. Im grateful you are where you are right now recooperating making progress, but if only I could take back the time and could have done something to Stop that accident from happening I would! I miss you sooo much that I get all kinds of mixed emotions. Which drive me nuts, make mad, get me frustrated, make me hate life, and feel like im losing it. Brother, I need you, I need you in my life, and I just cant move on seeing you there. It hurts, it hurts when you tell me you feel like you want to give up, that you are frustrated, that you dont want us to help you, that you yourself is losing it. And I dont blame you, I cant imagine the feelings you get of being trapped inside your own body unable to do everything you used to do and not depend on anyone else to do it for you. I know and i trully understand how you feel. If I had the choice to do anything else for you I would. As I told you, we made it through the worst, and now comes the rest, I told you I need you, that you cant give up, not today not ever, because we still have a long road ahead of us. You are one of many of gods soldiers and I know we will win this battle. And we will keep patiently waiting on more progress. Words cannot express the pain. All I know know how much weve missed you. How much we need you. How you make influence in our daily lives. Life itself is not the same without you on your feet. But I know that one day, one day you will be back, back to being you. I will see you come in the door walking on your own with a big Smile and telling me Bruuujjjaaa I missed you. Come towards me give me that Huge hug and kiss on my cheek and hold me tight and then start laughing and talking about random stupid things. I LOVE YOU! And I will keep waiting on you no matter how long it takes I will ALWAYS stand by your side.
Posted on: Sat, 12 Jul 2014 06:31:43 +0000
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