6847- I have done stuff that are frowned upon my religion and I have friends that only exist if they can benefit from something....The only thing that made me happy was the fact I have 2 good friends who didnt care for my mistakes. Life gets busy, I understand, however it doesnt mean that you begin to only communicate if you benefit from it as well. I dont trust others enough to just talk about my feelings/mistakes/regrets because of how guilty I feel for wronging my religion. I get soo depressed and its really disappointing when I know could do better. What hurts the most is when I accomplish my goals, I want to look back and share my joy with the ones I care for but when I do....no one is there and Im alone. It sucks, I want to cry more and just say Screw it, ppl are a pain and not worth it. The one I trusted the most, treats me the worst. Fact is, I cling for his attention the most (which I know is a long shot).....Cant I just press the restart button because even though there are strangers to hear me out, it just doesnt feel the same....I just want that one person I can lean on with no shame and support me on my struggles in life. I just dont know how long I can wait for my soulmate, if he even exists.......
Posted on: Fri, 19 Sep 2014 17:15:55 +0000