A comment I found on a YouTube Gnarles Barley Crazy that needs to be shared: youtu.be/Qe500eIK1oA The year I literally began to lose my mind for a time. The long storys way too long, and the short one, which is still pretty long, is that I believe there are myriad and complex causes and triggers for what we call mental illness. And I believe that sometimes, like the time it happened to me, its our minds, souls, and bodies crumbling from the deep down knowledge that weve built a life - a whole complicated, interwoven, interdependent and seemingly inescapable life - on entirely wrong foundations for the person we are. I also believe that when this is the cause of your illness, there is no real treatment or cure but to allow yourself to feel the excruciating terror and agony of the depths of its hell until the desire to free yourself from the indescribable pain of it finally exceeds the fear of the fallout from leaving that life behind you, severe though it may be for all involved. I remember being in the depths, looking to the sea of shared depression experiences on the internet for just one story that resonated with what I knew was my truth - that I, through the accumulation of years of conscious, well meaning, but ultimately misguided choices, had gotten myself there and that I could only escape by unraveling that accumulation - and finding nothing but stories of people who seemed resigned to dancing with depression for the rest of their lives for some reason or other. It would take me almost a year to break out from under the behemoth that was my depression. And then almost two years of fantastical fallout and chaos that could probably make for a great Lifetime movie before I could begin to rebuild the life my soul and psyche had demanded I raze. But even the worst moments of that fallout and chaos had more truth and integrity to them than all the 13 years before. And then I was free. This is not to invalidate the struggles, suffering, and courage of those who may face an ongoing battle with depression, but rather to lend hope and a voice of experience to anyone else who might feel themselves in that place in which I found myself in 2006. It might have to get worse before it gets better, but the better is so worth the worse if youre willing to keep walking through the fire. Hang in there. With love, me
Posted on: Thu, 25 Sep 2014 00:09:24 +0000
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015