A summer morning tale of terror. In a quiet, so quiet as to once earning the title of the most boring town in all of the state, Southern Californian bedroom community, in a most typical of typical homes, a woman stands in the shower, water blinding her as she reaches for her bottle of conditioner. She frowns as she feels the tell tale lightness of the bottle. In desperation she turns the bottle upside down, smacking the side of the bottle against her palm repeatedly. Thunk, thunk, and hollow thunk.. then a moment of silence as she optimistically attempts to pour whatever dregs her efforts had conjured up, but to no avail. Down but not defeated, our suburban heroine, leaves the shower, a towel haphazardly wrapped around her, leaving a trail of water drops behind her as she approaches the cupboard. As a puddle collects under her, she fumbles about in search of a new bottle of conditioner. In a moment of triumph she congratulations herself for having the foresight to keep a bottle of conditioner on hand for just such occasions. Alas though, as you were warned, this is a tale of terror, thus her joy was short lived as she soon discovered that the spare conditioner was not conditioner at all but a bottle of shampoo. As her fear built, and the puddle of bath water on the floor grew, she began to frantically knock aside bottles of hand soap, little hotel bottles of shampoo, half filled (or half empty if you are a pessimist) containers of lotion, a jar of bath salt with a remnant of Christmas paper still on it until she was confronted with a harsh reality in the form of the back of the cupboard. There. Was. No. Conditioner! Faced with only one option, and that option was in a cheerful pink bottle with a smiling octopus by the inexplicable name of Riley Raspberry (as it was written on the bottle), she sighed and filled her palm with tear free kids 3-in-1 wash, wondering how the product which claimed to be body wash, shampoo and conditioner would know that of its multiple personalities, it would be the conditioner that she would need for her hair and not the body wash? And this... this kids, was how the legend of the Straw Haired Lady began.
Posted on: Wed, 25 Jun 2014 17:59:46 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015