ACHTUNG! Many a metalhead has run afoul of this slippery rascal known as mosh masseuse. He likes to lurk around at metal shows, on the outskirts of moshpits, or preferably front and center where people are throwing up their arms in rapt adulation of their favorite bands. He will usually grasp onto his victims shoulders, as if excitedly sharing brotherly enthusiasm for the music, but BEWARE! This scoundrel makes his living by pilfering the patches from the vests of unwary concert attendees, to later be sold online. If approached, he may express concern for your weary shoulder muscles and offer a relaxing neck rub between sets, but dont be fooled! Pins and patches are what this treacherous snake is after, and that ripping sound will often be unnoticed until its too late.... It is best to wear a large assortment of patches from Germanic bands such as Sodom, Kreator, Destruction, etc. and black metal like Burzum, Satanic Warmaster, or Nokturnal Mortum, as he seems to show an aversion to these for some reason.
Posted on: Wed, 03 Dec 2014 02:45:13 +0000
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