Age 31 is coming to a close soon. Its been a challenging year and currently I only foresee things still getting worse. I see troubles and problems that I have no idea how I am going to fix. For all I know this next year will be a huge breaking point and I just might have to move back to my hometown for having grown weary of worry, frustration and ultimately a lack of money. Not what I want to happen but I can only go so long without getting myself into deeper problems. However sprinkled in between the obstacles I did get to experience some good things this past year. I got to see one of my favorite bands play before they broke up, I got to visit the Stanley Hotel and have lunch there (something I have always wanted to do.), I finally self published some material I have been holding onto for years now, and I got asked to be apart of something that my favorite artist of all time is doing, and even got to collaborate with her daughter on a special project. I am a simple person who has battled with low self-esteem, depression, oppression, loneliness, rejection, lack of money, bad choices, and faith. There are reasons behind my darkness sometimes. Why I may seem to be so filled with hatred or envy. I dont mind admitting this because I know I am not the only one. If it wasnt for God I would have no hope or light in my life so I am glad for him and though I am not one his best, I believe in Him and am happy to talk about Him with others. I have nothing about me to say I have no need of others or God. I have been single for about 9 years now. I dont have that special someone to run to for comfort or support. There are very few that I call a friend, people who have I have connected to on human and spiritual level. I am glad for them. I am open to whatever may fall my way this next year be it good or bad. Despite a lack of money and accomplishments I have been richly blessed and given opportunities that I know others have not had and would be thankful for. There is a lot for me to work on in every area of my life. I suppose it is good to have that. I shall occupy until God says its time to go.
Posted on: Tue, 02 Sep 2014 19:44:51 +0000
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