All relationships will have conflict because no two people are the same but it is amazing how much time we can spend with someone denying the severity of their dysfunction simply because we envision them to be different than they are. We ignore things because we want to convince ourselves that with time, enough work or expression that things will change. We convince ourselves the things we dont like really arent that big of a deal. That type of denial works well to keep us in fantasy but it pulls us completely away from reality. As time goes on our ability to keep the denial alive starts to fade and this is where we begin to realize that this person has stayed the same and we have been working so hard to keep things going only to find out that they are who they are and now we are resentful because we worked so hard, gave them everything and our reality still didnt change. When we love ourselves, we love others differently. We love them consciously. We look to see who they are from an objective point of view and when things dont feel good we state that in clear terms but we dont jump into over-functioning to pretend these things dont exist. Instead, we observe and we think deeply about if this is something or someone that we could live with. If it is not, then we love ourselves enough to not try and force our situation to change, we love ourselves and the other enough to part ways. This is hard but it is smart and this is why loving ourselves is in many ways is protective.
Posted on: Fri, 12 Dec 2014 12:00:01 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015