Anxiety is such an endemic and subconscious emotion that we don’t even think about what it’s doing to us. But anxiety is probably the most powerful thing thwarting our happiness, health, career, relationships, and overall quality of life. Much anguish is borne out of wishing we had more time for something or someone. And when time begins to slowly take away what we once took for granted, we become frightened and insecure, fearful of what we might become, or petrified that we might not have the time to do what we want to do. We all feel anxiety. And this stems from our inability to let go and just let things be. Sure, the fear of judgement and negative consequences can help us anticipate challenges and prepare for them, but quite a bit of it is unmanageable. From a scathing remark about our talent or looks to being lonely or losing our life or loved ones, these things all terrify us to some degree. And even if they may not at this time because life is good, when it does happen, some of us can become lost. When we’re anxious, we become disoriented. Instead of feeling the moment, we become distracted. We may turn to drastic measures that ultimately do not change anything or even make things worse. Instead of feeling and flowing with the melody, we become preoccupied with the notes. Rather than listening to the natural ebb and flow of our bodies, we punch and stretch it in order to march in the industrial parade. We’re taught that “selfishness” or should I say, self-focus is a bad thing. And so some of us struggle all our lives to be more selfless or at least less “selfish”. And though selflessness is a noble objective, resisting our inherent “selfishness” ironically, may not automatically lead to selflessness. Psychopaths are not self-focused. They are fixated on everything else – “The world is bad”, “They are wrong”, “The world hates me”, “They don’t deserve to live”. That’s why they fall into self-degradation, self-mutilation, self–loathing, and ultimately project that onto the world. They feel they need to prove to the world that they are something. The most dangerous people in the world are the ones who feel the most repressed. If we first see ourselves, then we begin to see others... When we first acknowledge our human-ness, and forgive, accept and embrace ourselves, we then understand that others are only human too... and begin to forgive, accept and embrace them too. When our focus is on perceived external injustice, there can be no inner peace. And when we cannot find peace within ourselves, it becomes impossible to make peace with the world. Ironically, when we care less about others, we actually begin to care more for them… We can’t change how people feel about us. Even if we can, how long will it last? We quickly learn to take the good life as not good enough. Just as many of us feel that a good child is not good enough. He has to be better. The best. Never mind if he’s happy or not. When we are struggling to find meaning because people are always talking about “purpose” and “passion” and “charity” and “clarity”, and we’re still no clearer, that’s when an eureka moment of “nothing matters”, “nobody matters”, “I don’t matter”, can clarify things. Because that’s when we find our own personal motivation. Something that no “self-help” book or seminar can do for us. It’s a clean slate. From now on… you write your own truth.
Posted on: Tue, 29 Jul 2014 17:07:46 +0000
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