“Any fool can start arguments; the honorable thing is to stay out of them.” (Proverbs 20:3 TEV) Wise people are peacemakers, not troublemakers. Wise people don’t carry a chip on their shoulder. They are not always looking for a fight, and they don’t intentionally antagonize other people. The fact is, if you’re around anybody for any length of time, you figure out what irritates him or her, and you file that information in the back of your mind as a tool to use when you get in an argument. It’s a weapon of mass destruction! When you get in an argument, and that person says something that hurts, offends, or slights you in any way, then you pull out the big gun. You push his hot button. And it works every time! We all use tools, tricks of the trade, and skills in relationships that are actually counter productive. They’re hurtful, they’re harmful, and they don’t get you what you want out of relationships. In fact, they get you the exact opposite behavior. But when we lack wisdom, we use them anyway. There are many of these tools, but here are just a few: Comparing: NEVER compare your wife, your husband, your kids, your boss, or anybody else, because everybody’s unique. Comparing antagonizes anger. Condemning: When you start laying on the guilt in a relationship, all you’re going to do is get the exact opposite of what you expect. It doesn’t work. It’s foolish. Contradicting: William James, the famous psychologist said, “Wisdom is the art of knowing what to overlook.” There’s some stuff you just need to overlook. Proverbs 14:29 says, “A wise man controls his temper. He knows that anger causes mistakes”. Have you ever said or done anything stupid out of anger? Yes. Because when you get angry, your intelligence goes out the window. When you get angry, you say and do stupid things that are actually self-defeating. Did you ever think about the fact that there is only one letter difference between “anger” and “danger”? When you get angry, you are in dangerous territory. You are about to hurt others — and yourself — with your own anger. The Danger in Anger by Rick Warren Daily Cup of Joy We can choose to make our life beautiful by inculcating the virtues of Love, Peace, Serenity and Joy or we can make it miserable by remaining stuck in anger. It is up to us to make Happiness a way of life, by leaving behind past experiences that had a negative impact in our mind. Love always
Posted on: Wed, 28 Aug 2013 08:53:17 +0000
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