Are you a good parent! All parents on here have times when they question what they are doing. They wonder if they are being a good parent. Let me give you my professional criteria for good parent in your situation. Are you acting out of love? Are you trying to do your best? Do you question what you are doing? Do you seek out advice and try to learn as you go? Are you worried about being a good parent? Answering yes to those questions makes you a good parent! Does it mean always making the right decisions, never getting frustrated at your child, never saying things that you regret later, and never feeling guilty about wanting some time alone. NO! There is not one right answer, and there is so much that we do not know in this field. There are many different approaches and no right one. You are not always going to make the right decisions, no one will. Rarely do the momentary decisions that you make have drastic or long term effects on your child. If you were a bad parent you would: Not be posting on this board in the first place. Rarely question what you are doing. Rarely feel guilty over what you did. Rarely seek advice and rarely worry if you are being a good parent. The fact that you guys are here puts you in the running for good parent! Take a deep breath, hold each others’ hands, laugh and cry with each other, and take note that you all are special people and loving parents. There are no exact manual or right answers in parenting in general, and especially for autism. There is not a more daunting task then facing the day to day uncertainty of the journey that you travel. You will stumble, you will fall, you will get mud all over you, but most likely, since you are a “good” loving parent, you will get up every morning and do it all over again! When frustrated, drained, feeling confused and inadequate we often think, feel, say, and act in ways that we regret later! You cannot parent a special needs child without these moments! Every parent has them; every human experiences them! It is not these momentary frustrations that define if you are a good parent. It is the ongoing passion to love, support, and advocate for your child, even when others around you may not be giving you that feedback. It is the intent and passion for which you navigate your journey that defines your legacy as a parent. So, forgive and forget when you stumble and simply pull yourself back up and take that step forward. We will be here holding your hand and patting you on the back!
Posted on: Tue, 02 Dec 2014 23:14:27 +0000
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