As I get ready to retire facebook for the day I reflect on how much I love my Wounded Warrior. I remember him sending me this song one day after I put us on a divorce track. You see behind the doors of a war stricken home can sometimes be a struggle to find yourself when your senses have been heightened with death, blood, chaos, and the prices of American freedoms. For the spouse and children of this person there lies a trail of coldness and unnappreciation. That things can be done in the heat of running from whats inside us. I once had to do everything for him. I had to feed him and do things men do not want their spouses to do for them. Then I failed in the aspect of returning to him back his freedoms. Letting him carry his burdens and consequences. That their behaviors are not always attatched to you. Sometimes they never found out who they were again. This stemed my role reversal for him and his accountability for who he wanted to be and what he has left to fight for, here on his home terf. We all have fighters and different seasons inside of us. Veterans or not. To all my veterans and caregivers the struggles are real and they are overbearing at times, but remember SOMEONE out there might can help you. Noone can truly help if we dont help ourselves. I admire all of you in my life. I say thank you for your shining example to never quit. Forgiving my husband and accepting him was a process. We dont love because of our faults. We inspire each other to dive deep and explore the solution. Be your mate or freinds help, not their burden. He has to learn to reach out and I have to stay out and let him own his behaviors and accomplishments. This my freinds is the walk of a war stricken household....... Relearning to live again after the visions of the ugly of the world is the veterans and their families struggle. Love them even through the ugly is the key. :) I love each of you...... I fell in love all over with my husband when he sent me this song that day. All I needed was for him to wake up and fight again for what he loves. Cold Looking back at me I see That I never really got it right I never stopped to think of you Im always wrapped up in Things I cannot win You are the antidote that gets me by Something strong Like a drug that gets me high What I really meant to say Is Im sorry for the way I am I never meant to be so cold To you Im sorry about all the lies Maybe in a different light You could see me stand on my own again Cause now i can see You were the antidote that got me by Something strong like a drug that got me high I never meant to be so cold I never really wanted you to see The screwed up side of me that I keep Locked inside of me so deep It always seems to get to me I never really wanted you to go So many things you should have known I guess for me theres just no hope I never meant to be so cold
Posted on: Tue, 21 Oct 2014 17:55:52 +0000
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