As I sit here wide awake early early Christmas morning, daughter asleep in her bed, I yet again cant sleep because of so many things going through my head. Ever since leaving the military the world has shown me the ugly side. There are things Ive never seen happen before and things people do I could never fathom people could do. I know its a culture shock and it will pass but regardless of whats going on, I still seem to be awake. Ive never been able to have a day where I dont think about things that honestly shouldnt worry me. I dont think its anxiety because it doesnt really affect my day to day but still makes me think. I wish everyone a merry Christmas and a joyous new year but somehow it doesnt feel that way for me. It sometimes feels like the people around me only care to my face but when Im not there they dont even think twice about me. I know my family back home thinks about me all the time and thats to be expected, theyre family. Yet there not a soul I can honestly say outside my family that I can have that same feeling with. Theres no one outside my family that I know that shows that they think about me without me being there. Thats painful to me. Theres no one in my life outside my family that could say they love me. Theres no one outside my family that shows affection and compassion for me. I know I sound like a whiney brat but I havent felt that in A VERY long time. I just wish Santa could bring someone into my life that could show me these qualities. Heres to hoping!
Posted on: Thu, 25 Dec 2014 09:16:59 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015