~Bo F Betrayed by a Borderline. Source: savorydish.wordpress/2011/06/01/betrayed-by-a-borderline/ Nobody should ever accuse a partner or ex-partner of a borderline/rape survivor of not having enough compassion. If anything, they are guilty of too much compassion. A commenter, Chris, tells his story in response to a post titled When Borderlines Cut You Out of Their Life: I have recently been there. I started to write this post twice about my experience but it started to turn into a book. My X also had been raped in her early twenties. I did not learn about it until a year into our relationship. She really played it down but I wonder just how much it affected her. Keep in mind this is someone I had known for 23 years and we dated in high school. She recently came back into my life. Just some advice to anyone. Just run. It will zap your soul and drive you insane. A borderline works on an entirely different level of logic. They are not caring and they do not know how to love. You are only as good as your last conversation with them. They will tell you they have loved you all their lives and the next day you are the worse person for them. When you leave them they will date your friends, ruin relationships with mutual friends, and tell lies to their new boyfriends about you. When you react to their insanity they will threaten you with restraining orders. Then they will come back to you. They will play vulnerable and seductive to get you back, and if you have any co-dependent tendencies you will take them back. Once they have you back they will tell you just how much they love you. They are smart, funny, charming and the good times are awesome and at those times you will love them and think perhaps it is someone you want to spend the rest of your life with. Get it in your head right now. There is no fixing them and it will not get better no matter how much of a white knight you are. Leave them and don’t look back. Get off facebook and break all contact until you feel strong. Do not respond to them and don’t even piss on them if they are on fire. They will try everything to get you back into their lives to repeat the hurtful cycle over and over again. Case in point. In my last breakup with my BPD I caught her contacting men on craigslist for dates by reading her email. Our prior breakup resulted in her going after a guy I knew only to cheat on him with me. The remorse I got for reading her email and ending it was a call from the police threatening arrest for gaining access to her email. Three months later she starts contacting me again only to want to play I have a new guy game again. I refused to play. Two months after that she comes telling me the new great guy tried to strangle her. Me being the fool I get sucked in showing her compassion only to have her cycle of rejection and hurt start all over again. BTW…she got back together with the guy that tried to strangle her. If she thinks you are the crazy one let her think that way. Do not try to explain your feelings to them as they don’t look at things as a history. They only react to the way they feel now and they will never see your point of view. They may pretend to have remorse but they do not. They are so caught up in their image of self it has nothing to do with you. Save yourself and get out and forgive yourself for things you may have done or said during your time with your BPD. The fact you are here reading this means you are trying to make sense of things which already makes you a good person. Be careful when dealing with a borderline who is also a rape survivor or even alleged survivor. This is someone who has been severely traumatized and most likely has been re-traumatized over and over again. Any impression that this person is perfectly fine is a false impression. Most likely created by the borderline/survivor. Never mind how much you think he/she loves you. Without treatment, this person is literally incapable of love or intimacy. When someone is this traumatized, they can turn on you at any moment.
Posted on: Thu, 18 Jul 2013 20:13:43 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015