Bruce,i went to my second to the last grief recovery class on monday and it went pretty well.i had a list of things to forgive you for and some aplogies to make but that part was real brief and the longest part was significant emotional statements.I had all kinds of things that you did to make me proud and happy memories and i kinda breezed thru the whole thing untill the last one.as i started to read it my eyes welled up with tears and i had a huge lump in my throat and it was all i could do to read my last statement to you.I feel like Im finally starting to crawl out of the hole that Ive been in for a while but its a journey.I dont want to put this all on you and thats part of the reason Im taking this class.months and months ago someone trying to cheer me up said that what if you had never been born,at least i got to spend 23 years with you.while those kind of things may ring intellectually true at the time it means nothing because intellect has nothing to do with it its all emotional.the reason Im even taking this class in the first place is that my friend told me that now he can think of his son that he lost and that now it puts a smile on his face and last week i had a memory of you that did put a smile on my face.I think that the day is coming that having had you for 23 years is going to bring me joy again in being able to remember the gift that you were to me in the short time you were here.I was supposed to write your letter for my class and go back on friday and read it but i didnt make it.I think that Im still a little intimidated by it,i guess its like taking that last trip to the summit,i promise i will do it this week.in the mean time i miss you,love you and cant wait till the next time i see you again dad.
Posted on: Sun, 17 Nov 2013 05:53:57 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015