DIVING FOR A PENALTY In modern soccer, you dont just kick the - TopicsExpress

DIVING FOR A PENALTY In modern soccer, you dont just kick the ball towards your opponents goal post. You also have to fake major injuries. When the ball is heading for the goal post, play for a hair-thin brushing with an opponents leg so that you can hurl yourself dramatically on the ground, wriggle and clutch your leg.(you must remember that the leg that which brushed off the opponent is the one supposed to be in pain.) Scream out convincingly such that the referee either gets you a priest to administer the last sacrament immediately, or gets an ambulance, or a gives you a penalty. And when he chooses to ignore you, well, bad day! You get up and continue playing. Soccer players have learnt the politicians motto: if you try and dont succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie; The Best Of Dr Love, pp 51

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