Dear Mom, Happy birthday! I’m pretty sure earthly birthdays don’t matter in heaven, but just in case they do, I’m telling you. You would have said today was nothing special, just another day. I would give anything to make it something special, instead of wishing you a happy birthday in Heaven. It makes me incredibly sad that you are not here for me to wish you Happy Birthday. The most difficult thing for me is that I cant talk to you we shared everything! Now, I write and I hope that somehow you are able to read these words or hear me. The waves of grief are so devastating some days! I thought there would be no worse pain than knowing you were dying and saying goodbye. Some days the grief is so heavy and I am not prepared because I thought I should be able to cope better by now. I know that grief is a journey, and that the more we love, the more we hurt. I love you so much mom for you compassion, and wisdom, your love and your presence you were bigger than this life, and even after your death, your life has a huge impact on mine. The 15th of each month comes, and I realize another month has passed since the day of our separation. I believe the Bible says that one day in Heaven is like 1,000 days here on earth so then, you probably havent been in Heaven 15 minutes yet. Although you were far too young to die, the angels took you in their arms because your time here in this lifetime was complete. You had done all that you needed to do. The Lord was ready for you. Age is nothing but a number. I have learned dont count the years, count the life in those years.You were known for you love, compassion and ability to hug a complete stranger. I can only hope that in my lifetime that I am half of the woman you were to so many. Mom, you are my best friend, my encourager, my mother, my life. I love you forever. I grew and was born from your womb and so incredibly blessed to be called your daughter. However, the love that grew and was birthed in my heart from growing up with you as my mother is a far more miraculous thing! I am who I am because God gave me you as a role model. I learned to love others unconditionally, until they hurt me or let me down, and to then forgive them and love them again. How did I get so blessed that God would give me to the best mom on earth? I know how proud you would be of me. You were always my best cheerleader, in true GOLDIE style. I grin even now knowing how proud you would be of me. There’s no bond quite like that between mother and child. You know me in ways no one else ever will. Thank you for always, always being on my side and having my back. I will always carry you in my heart wish you were here. I am counting the days until I see you again. Have a heavenly birthday. Literally. Love you mom!!!
Posted on: Sat, 15 Nov 2014 17:13:05 +0000
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