Dear boss, baridi nayo? That’s a Limuru expression that means, and the cold itself….it’s like a greeting but not really. As in like for finding out if you are also cold but in greeting form but different. It’s complicated. So just lenga that vibe and read this one. “hello boss” Lenga is a Pwani word that means to aim, but not as in you aim for a vibe or anything, infact don’t aim at all ok. Not that you are not good at aiming but….eish it’s complicated today. So we are starting again. Hello boss, you are the illest. But not as in disease wise. Yesterday we tried pulling for you cable but you were mteja. What cut? Not cut as in of the cable, but as in happened. Mteja is a customer, not that you were our customer. We are not selling anything to you, but safaricom’s customer. Not that they were looking for you but as in, we were the ones looking for you, but we asked safaricom to find you and you couldn’t be found. Not as is you were lost, so we didn’t report to the police but …….eish just lenga that vibe. So we wanted you to come to Guava and treat us, we were broke. Not guava as in of fruit, but as in the place. But not treat as in medically but as in financially, yaani our wallets were sick not us. Not sick as in leather wallets from a sick cow, but as in we were broke. Well, apart from Vomiting Joyce aka Vomz, she’s the sick one. She has been vomzing again. Her morning sickness have come back in the afternoons, especially when she sees eggs. So weird. Ayway we are broke, Njoro the accountant is measuring our madness, he still hasn’t started processing the salaries for September and it has bitten itself each other again for us. Tell him to stop of those ones, Johnny says if he doesn’t pay us by next week, he will see him. But not see as in of appointment, but see as in ataona, yaani as in, he will see him for real, not that he was not seeing before but he will see properly. Eish just lenga that vibe. Just tell Njoro the accountant that he pays us, the government has said so. Johnny says he knows people who can make sure he pays. He is baba yao. And he knows Sossion. Not that Johnny is Sossion’s baba, but as in he is baba yao those ones of illuminati. So he said if Njoro doesn’t pay, he will ask Sossion to tell teachers not to teach Njoro’s toi. Toi is Jeri word for child. Jeri is short for Jericho. Jericho is a place where all acrobats come from, but there’s nothing bibilical that happens there eg donkey rides, palm leaves, miracles. Bilaz. Actually Jeri is a place where companies advertise products on walls of people’s houses. Ok there are a few miracles, like you put clothes on the line and they disappear.. but that’s about it. Kama has a ka new mamsita she is a daughter of an ambassador, yaani he has fallen on mbaya. Fallen on as in not for walking but ameangukia, as in those ones of …….just lenga that vibe. Just know Kama doesn’t need that November salo advance like the rest of us. But they refused him a visa, they said he has a record and not as in of Franco. I think his mamsita is from S.A, she has a complicated name with a click as in Mtkchwakidza, we just call her weeee nani! But she loves Kama. Yaani nowadays Kama speaks everything with a click sound ati funga mnktlango hehehehee yaani even he laughs those ones of khoisans of nktanktanktanktaaaanktaaanktaaaa. Eish just lenga that vibe. So his mamsita was angry at Daddy for nyimaing his boyfie visa to Joburg. Nyimaing is a Buru word for refusing. Buru is a place where beautiful chics live but then can beat a man. anyway, Weee Nani ran away from home and wants to live with Kama, wah! Yaani she hasn’t seen his place yet, I’m sure she will Vulindlela Kama when she has to shower communally. Anyway we all slept in the office last night we didn’t have fare to for taxi. We were helping the watchman guard equipment, so we will sign for overtime. Thanks you are the illest. Anyway we are having breako from the office coffee machine since it’s buree. Later on we have lunch at Weeee Nani’s house, it’s South Africa day for something and we are invited. Not we as in including you. You are not on the list, hehehehehee, we can put you on the list if you give us salo advance for November. Nktaaaanktaaanktaaaa, as in of laughter. See you kesho boss. You are still the illest. But not illest than Kama aka TKZ. PS: When are you going on leave? We want to have interns again. Nktaaanktaaanktaaa
Posted on: Sun, 07 Jul 2013 08:14:44 +0000
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