Drive it like you stole it! -- Being legally blind I dont drive anymore. However, I still need to get around. I have good friends who help make that happen. When I dont have them available I rely on cabs or public transportation (Paratransit bus). A few weeks ago I needed to get to an appointment across town. I scheduled the bus. The bus showed up late. We then had to pick someone else up and drop that person at their destination before going on to mine. I started to get frustrated as it became obvious I would be late to my appointment. I dont like being late nor making others wait for me. My body started getting tense. I was getting angry. I mumbled harshly under my breath, Cmon, man! Drive it like you stole it! As soon as those words passed my lips I realized what I had done. I was placing responsibility for my frustration on the driver. I sat back and reflected on my intentions. How is it his fault?, I asked myself. I wasnt asking how it was his fault we were late. Maybe it was and maybe it wasnt. What I was asking myself was how is it his fault I was getting tense and angry. Anthony DeMello wrote, Negative feelings are in you. No person on earth has the power to make you unhappy. There is no event on earth that has the power to disturb you or hurt you. No event, condition, situation, or person. Let me clarify the hurt thing. I dont think he is saying people cant do you harm. It happens all the time. DeMello is speaking to our emotional response to things. Stuff happens. How we respond is on us. Dr.s John Townsend and Henry Cloud, authors of Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life, wrote, In order to gain control of our feelings, behaviors, choices and the like, we must first realize that they are ours and no one else’s. They reside in our own souls, so the ownership implies the responsibility. With ownership comes responsibility. Owning my own emotions and feelings is the first, and I would say the most important, step toward a stress-less life. No person on earth has the power to make me unhappy. Hmmm...the power really is my own to choose how I will feel and/or be moved be a situation. I began to get tense and angry about being late to an appointment. When I made it about the driver, or even about another passenger who got picked up after me and got dropped off before me, I could easily have worked myself up and blamed it on someone else. Both would have been unnecessary and misguided. Those emotions and feelings that day on the bus were of my own creation. Nobody put those on me. Once I reminded myself of that I took the liberty of casting them off. I changed my perspective. I chose to just let it be what it was. What freedom! What power! The rest of the ride was an easy deal. In fact, because I chose to adjust my reaction then the rest of my day was pretty sweet as well. You, too, have that kind of power within you. How are you using it? Blessings, yall -- Ed
Posted on: Sun, 14 Dec 2014 15:06:31 +0000
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