ECONOMIC MODELS EXPLAINED WITH COWS : Socialism ; You have two cows. You give one to your neighbor . Communism ; You have two cows. The State takes both and gives you milk. FASCISM ; You have two cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk . NAZISM : You have two cows . The government takes both and shoots you. Bureaucracy ; You have two cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other , and then throws the milk away. TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM ; You have two cows . You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and deduct the income. DEMOCRACY : You have two cows . Your neighbor has none. You choose people in government that levy taxes on your cows , forcing you to sell one to raise money to pay for the tax. The people you elected into government takes tax money and buy a cow and give it to your neighbor. You feel it is fair. AMERICAN CAPITALISM ; You have two cows . You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later , you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has dropped dead on . FRENCH CAPITALISM ; You have two cows . You go on strike , organize a riot , and block the roads , because you want three cows. GERMAN CAPITALISM ; You have two cows. You re - design them so they live for 100 years , eat once a month , and milk themselves . JAPANESE CAPITALISM ; You have two cows. You re - design them so they are one tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce as much milk 20 cows. You then create a clever cow cartoon - called COWKIMON and market it worldwide. ITALIAN CAPITALISM ; You have two cows, but you do not know where they are. You decide to have lunch. SWISS CAPITALISM , you have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you . You charge the owners for storing them . Chinese capitalism ; You have two cows . You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity. You arrest news reporter who reported the real situation . RUSSIAN CAPITALISM ; You have two cows. You count them and find out that you have five cows. You count them again and find that you have 42 cows. You count them again and find that you have two cows. You stop counting cows and open a bottle of Vodka . INDIAN CAPITALISM ; You have two cows . You worship them . BRITISH CAPITALISM ; You have two cows . Both are wrong . Iraqi CAPITALISM ; Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. No one believes you, so they bomb the crap out of you and invade your country. You still have no cows, but at least you are now in a democracy. AUSTRALIAN CAPITALISM ; You have two cows . Business seems pretty good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate. NEW ZEALAND CAPITALISM ; You have two cows . The one on the left looks very attractive out . GREEK CAPITALISM ; You have two cows borrowed from French and German banks . You eat them both. Banks are calling for their milk , but you can not deliver then you call the IMF. IMF lends you two cows. You eat them both. Banks and IMF call for milk. You are then out and get a haircut .
Posted on: Tue, 20 May 2014 12:30:11 +0000
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