EPISODE 27 The only things that were still intact when I was done bringing the room down, were curtains hanging on the window. I began to pull them down too, together with the rail. I couldn’t stop the rage boiling inside of me. I bit the curtain and began to tear it with my teeth. I couldn’t grasp the thought of Mish’s heart and lungs alive anywhere in this world. He is supposed to be buried, all of him. Now I went crazy knowing that there was a high chance his heart could be the one that rejected me the other day, the one that specified its sole purpose and function as pumping blood and nothing else, … a heart that told me I didn’t have a place in it anymore. This is the heart that used to adore me, treat me like a fragile glass and even protect my own heart? How could a loving heart turn heartless? What if my instant attraction to this guy was because of the bond Mish’s heart and mine still had? Is that even possible? But how could the God that we prayed and worshipped as a family for years let that happen? Mish was a dedicated keyboard played at church. He loved and accepted Christ as his Lord and personal saviour. Now tell me what kind of God plays monopoly with the lives of His own children? Are we just clowns on puppet strings on this earth or what kante? Give me one reason why I shouldn’t hate this God? The more I thought these thoughts, the more I wanted to drop down and perish. I was what the doctors would diagnose as officially mad. Yes, I Gomolemo, Lemo-Lemo, Mondo, Molemo, Gomzito, Monkey-tricks Motau fell in that lowest category of people. From a straight A’s student to a case of insanity just like that. Next time you see a crazy person on the street do not poke fun at all. You just don’t know what tipped some of them off the mental sanity scale. Anyone is capable of going crazy. My father had long stopped begging me to stop. He called my mother and the ambulance and before I knew it, the door was kicked open and I was being dragged down my own house’s passage to what was deemed a safer place. When did a home stop being the safest place on earth for a young girl? The men in uniform were so territorial with my body. They slapped my wrists, looking for pulses. I wanted to tell them that I was okay, but my tongue wouldn’t move, it just filled my mouth. It stuffed and grilled in my mouth like a lamb chunk inside a very heated oven. My whole body temperature hit the sky. I was feverish. I fought my way off of their masculine hold with everything I had. By everything I had I mean that I kicked, bit with my teeth and knocked them with my head. They still won. They lay me on a stretcher and made me swallow tranquilizers. I had a glimpse of my mother rushing towards me. I don’t know if she was running in slow motion or the drug made it seem that way. My eyes closed and I forced them open. They closed again and I forced them open. Then I couldn’t open them at all but I could still hear her calling out for me. “(((Mooo-nnnn-DD-dododo)))” Her voice had many layers of echoes. It started with hers. Then I heard my father’s tone wrapping hers around. I heard the echo of Mish’s voice too. The last voice was Derrick fountain junior’s smug one, traumatising me even more. The voices faded and I slipped into the heaviest sleep of all times within three minutes. When I woke up, days had gone by. I didn’t know yet, so I thought I had simply died. The room was pure white from the walls to the roof to the sheets that covered me. There were no windows at all and the roof was high. It was very cool and had one magnifying lamp mounted on the wall and pointed directly at me, shedding the light all over the place, but mostly at me. My body felt very rejuvenated. I guess it was because in heaven there is neither sickness nor fatigue. If this was heaven, then I must have been a good child back on earth. Earth? I tried to recall events that brought me here but I couldn’t. I felt like I was transported to this place in a blink of an eye. I knew I was in an unfamiliar place, a peaceful place, but I just couldn’t imagine the old one vividly. I kept having visions of Mish, Neo and I climbing trees at our grandmother’s yard. I remembered it like it was yesterday. I also had memories of our family gatherings too fresh in my head. How my father played the harp, my other uncle the flute and my aunties, uncles, their wives and my cousins singing and dancing to the tune. I could almost hear the sound of the music, smell the delicious food, and touch all of them. I could almost smile with them, laugh with them. Smile with younger me. My paternal grandmother had eleven children, seven boys and four girls. We were all a happy bunch gathered together in peace and harmony. Neo and I wore matching clothes, church kind of clothes. We wore floral dresses matched with white stockings and white quarter heels. The heavy tapping of heels down the passage brought me back to reality. I turned my head fast and looked at the door, my ears stood on their feet while I waited for the door to open. Was I really in heaven, did Jesus call out for me? Was I about to be ushered by angels to the glorious throne of the Father? Yes I was a child …a young girl in a floral dress dancing to the sound of her father’s serenating harp. I had no sin… I must have made heaven. The square on the centre of the door lifted and revealed fingers covered with white gloves. Eyes peeped and spied, roaming around a little and landing on me. They were a scary pair, not evil kind of scary, but fearful kind of scary. When our eyes locked I watched as the pair of eyes became mellow with pity then deepened with mistrust, then back to mellow. What on earth was going on here, I mean, what on heaven was going on here? “She is awake…” She pulled her head back and whispered to somebody. She is awake? I tried to stand but my hands wouldn’t move. They were pinned to chains, chains pinned on bars on each side of the bed. I panicked and began to hear sirens in my head and a still voice loudly proclaiming “hell… hell… hell…” I fought to unchain myself, now fearful and sweating. I cried out, “Heeeeelllllpppp” in the middle of my cry for help, I heard another voice saying, “Be still and know that I am your God!” I stopped and listened to it. It awakened a song in me, and I dropped my head back on the pillow and started singing (((Be still, and know… that I’m the Lord… Be still… and know that I’m your God… In thee Oh Lord, I put my trust… in youuuuuuuuuu….))) The door opened and a man and a woman in uniform rushed in and towards me… THE END!!!
Posted on: Thu, 08 Jan 2015 08:28:18 +0000
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