EPISODE 9{Exclusive to nairamobilet.net} The walk to the eatery provided me with the opportunity to think. I had been taking actions without thinking and that has led to many troubles, this time its going to be different. It was time to put an end to this blackmail from Amaka. I continued thinking and trekking till i reached the eatery. It was one of the famous eatery on campus.CEDARwas boldly written at the top. I walked in majestically and quickly looked around like someone who came for a business meeting. At every table, there was always a guy and a girl. I began wondering if it was february 14. But unlike february 14, the guys where smiling. My eyes finally caught Amaka, she was sitting alone at a corner of the eatery. She was dressing coperate, like she just got a bank job. Difference was, her first three bottons where open revealing her huge bulbifera(b0:0b s). Those bosoms that were my key to #2000.Dont worry, when i get your time we go talki said to myself. Apart from her bosoms that suddenly carried out imbibition, the remaining body was the same. Her face looked like a nusery kids drawing book; it was a mixture of colours. But why do girls like mixing colours na? Maybe jumizie would help us out. Amaka stood up and gave me a hug, firmly pressing her bosoms on my chest. Electric currents where sent from my chest to all other parts of my body. Only jnr.kelvin understood the meaning of the signal, it just nodded in joy. I quickly withdrew from the hug before that young man disgraces me. Amaka was a good actress, imagine someone blackmailing you and hugging you. Well, even judas kissed Jesus when betraying him. I walked stylishly and sat quickly in other to hide the bulge in my trousers. Amaka smiled, trying to look cute but she looked the exact opposite. Amaka had a bottle of malt in front of her,she wanted to order for something for me but i declined, saying i wasnt hungry. I didnt reject the food because i wasnt hungry, i rejected the food because of what happened to me the last time i came to this eatery. It was the effect of that day that am still suffering. Yes i just ate chicken that doesnt mean i was filled. In our world, you have to fill your stomach to the brim, just incase you dont see another food to eat. That was a lesson i learnt from musa, The okosisi1 of mama alaja food joint. Amaka, lets just get to businessi said to Amaka who had been seriously smiling in a manner she probably thought was seductive. Okay, i just called you so we could hang out is there a problem with that? She asked still flashing her teeth. Amaka, i want you to just leave me alone. Stop terrorising my relationshipi said with so much anger in my voice. Vains where already bulging out of my forehead. Anytime i get angry, my vains had this funny way of bulging out, when it gets to that level, you know i am very angry. The last time my vain bulged like that, i killed 20ants. Kelvin calm downAmaka tried to calm me down. I relaxed a little bit since i was in public. She Brought out her phone and started pressing some keys. Kelvin hope you still remember my house? she asked. Amaka how can i ever forget you house? Do you think i can ever forget what happened the day i visited you? I asked her my own question. She concluded whatever she was doing with her phone and kept it back in her purse. Thats good because i would like you to visit me againAmaka concluded. You are not even serious i said and walked out if the eatery. I was fuming with anger, i had just wasted my precious time with that girl. Im going straight to bed i said to myself. I reached my compound to find a group of angry youths in my compound. I sensed danger, i was about turning back when mike my neighbour shoutedmake una see the person wey steal the fowl o. Its a very bad thing to have an angry mob pursueing you. Every nigerian is a law enforcement agent. That is why when you go to the market and you hear Ole! Ole! Ole! Please dont even try to run because when people see you running, you would be mistaken for the thief. The next thing you would start hearing is bring tyre, bring fuel. If not for the Aluu case that happened to bring some of these issues to the limelight, somepeople would still be unaware of thehidden policewe have in our society. The faces i saw in my compoud were like those of an angry spartan army. See the person wey steal the fowli heard mike shouted. I had watched movies on traitors, read books on traitors and even withnessed bretrayer but this one was different. This was the person i had been living with since i started the session. This was the same person i just finished eating with. As a sharp guy that i was, i just arranged my cloth and walked confidently towards the crowd. The worse thing those villagers would do is to hand me over to their chief and i will be made to sit on the ground while being judged for the whole school to see. Whats happening herei asked as soon as i reached. The plan was to speak plain english so as not to look like a tout. Where the fowl wey you steal? Their leader asked. Am not a thief and would never be a thief, why are you guys accusing me?i asked with so much confidence, my hand was in my pocket. I was just praying that those boys would not involve charms. I Hated charms. Him the lie o, the time wey him dey steal am, i been the tell am make e stop e no gree. Mike wasnt even a good liar. I made a mental note to treat his Bleep up at the right time. So you even see am when him been the thief am and you no fit stop am? The leader asked. The best way to catch a thief is to search his apartmenti said knowing fully well that the chicken was still remaining. Na true dis guy the talk, make we search him room, a short guy replied. Guys make una calm down first, rat die inside my room, the thing the smell una no go like enter omike tried to discourage the youths but they pushed him out of the way. I was outside with mike and some of the youths, two boys went inside to search the room. Moments later they came outside with the pot. Before i could say jack, a hot slap landed on mikes face. Jesus!! Mike so you are a thief? So you are responsible for all the missing items in this compound? I asked in mock suprise. My compound was very notorious for stealing. Since no one had been caught, it was safe to place it on mikes head. Chairmen, dis one na the fowl wey my mother give me from house omike said in defence. Dont worry, when we reach chief side, you go tell am. The leader spoke. Chairmen una dey carry dey chicken ma go?i spoke pidgin for the first time. The leader gave me a look that made me promise never to ask silly questions again. The pot was placed on mikes head, and he was dragged like the thief that he was, to the Court of the chief. Only God knows the kind of disgrace that he would face. I went inside and slept peacefully. *************** *************** ***** The mr and mrs fresher pageantry was just a day ahead. Philip had planned very well, he had already bought new clothes, shaved his hair, read some current affairs e.t.c Vivian was also trying so hard to prove her worth as a manager. Arrangements where already made on to convey us to and fro. Cynthia didnt come as promised, i just couldnt believe she had changed. I just pray philip wins tomorrow, his victory party would help alot. The D-day finally came, the so much publicised and talked about mr and mrs freshers pageantry was taking place in a few hours time. Vivian was with philip through out, there were practicing some questions. She was virtually following him everywhere he went. Philip had to bolt the door properly when he visited the toilet else vivian would have followed him. Musa and i were just watching like zombies while philip and vivian were preparing. Atleast vivian would be left for me after the pageantry or so i thought. We all prepared and the cab we had hired came and picked us to the venue. Musa didnt want to go at first but when i told him there would be enough food, he was the first to take his bath. All roads led to benco hotel, the venue of the pageantry. We reached the venue at about 7:45pm, the time of the event was 8:00pm till mama calls you. We showed our tickets to the huge bouncers, vivian had sponsored that aspect. Benco hotel conference hall was filled to the brim and more people where still coming. Naso year one like social gathering? I whispered to musa. no mind them, dem never see their G.P na, make them flex first.musa replied. According to research, the people you see with fancy clothes, the people you seebouncingand the people you see mostly in social gatherings are all year one students. Reason being that, they havent seen their results so they dont know how it feels to have a carry over or a G.P that cant even flash mtn to mtn. The hall was lively, students could be seen in groups. Well, not all could be called students. We all know nigerians and how they loved occasions, as long as it is rumored that they would be enough food. The DJ was playing a song by zule-zoo, i was wondering what he drank before he came for the show. The man just the do kelewawa kelewa kewa kelewawa Those where the lyrics of zule-zoos hit trackkelewa. I wonder how that song had managed to bring those two boys to the limelight. Somepeople where saying that the boys where members of illuminati, nothing wey we no go hear o. DJ dem tell you say we come for kwaghir? Someone shouted from the crowd. N.B:kwaghir is a kind of dance by the tiv people of benue state. The dj got the mood of the hall and changed the music toGo belowby od woods. Some guys got up to dance, some where just nodding their heads like agama lizard, musa was busy smiling like a roasted goat. Guy why you the happy na? I asked musa. You no see that guy dressing? He replied my question with a question, pointing somewhere. I traced the direction of the hand and i saw a guy that was wearing a red coat(not suit o) and a red hat, with walking stick.He was looking like kanayo .o. Kanayo in all those nollywood cult movies. Mumu, so na wetin make you the laugh be that? I asked musa Look the face well wellhe replied. I zoomed the face, it was chris the wole soyinka of uam. Chai!!!!Oboy this place go sweet today oi exclaimed. Chris was a contestant. I Wonder what he was thinking before he bought that form, he could have used that money to sponsor candidates like me. Oboy that guy no the shame o, na my father mate him be and e still the follow small boys drag for mr.fresher. Truth be told, the first time i saw chris in a lecture hall, i thought he was a lecturer. Philip and vivian had left us immediately we entered the hall, there went behind the stage where the contestants where dressing and getting set for the show proper. Can i have your attention ladies and gentlemensomeone was on the mic. He was well dressed, with his suit and fine leather shoes. My name isman wey get belleim a comedian and am going to be your master of ceremony for today. Oboy so na man wey get belle be dis? Him short omusa said. As you all know, we are here to see who is the most swagalicious and correctest guy and girl in 100level, university of agriculture makurdi. Man wey get belle kept blabbing and cracking dry jokes at regular intervals. His jokes where very dry. Trust uam boys na, nobody even smiled. It was getting out of hand and i wanted to give the guy a little encouragement so i promised myself to laugh at his next joke whether funny or not. Una know why i no fine? He asked the crowd, some people just managed to mumble some words with closed teeth. I been fine o, na when i do my fine boy reach soldierman place naim him spoil my face. I go the run soldier man wife. Soldier man beat me finish i enter zoo monkey ma dey close eye. I remembered my escapade with a soldierman. I gave out a huge laugh hahahaha. The whole auditorium was mute. I looked odd. Guy wetin na, u drink lizard piss before you come here?the mc asked. The whole crowd erupted in laughter. So na me wey wan help you naim you fall my hand? I asked myself. No worry, you go see something, i promised. Maybe him dey remember as soldier beat am maa guy added insult to my injury. The crowd was still laughing when someone tapped me. Is this seat taken? Someone brought me back from my thoughts, it was Amaka. We always try to avoid troubles at all cost but somehow, trouble always springs up. That was my case, Amaka was my trouble and she keeps following me as if i had been bugged. Has this seat been taken? Amaka asked. I wanted to tell her the seat had been taken but musa quickly told her it hadnt. I gave musa this kinda look that could make you give your life to christ. He understood and just grinned. Hope you are enjoying the showAmaka asked. I wasnt enjoying the show, all thanks to that silly MC but i just had to play along. Am enjoying every moment of iti replied her. Do you know you would have been part of the contest? She asked another question. Musa was busy concentrating on the show that he even forgot i was there. Oh yea! I would have been part of the contest no thanks to you.i replied her. At this point, a benue based musician was performing and the crowd was feeling the boy. He was one of the several talents from benue(no gain saying benue is the talent basket of the nation *winks*) I gave you #2000 and you were scared to pick it upAmaka continued her conversation. Dem send dis girl? Others where enjoying what they paid for and she was boring me with her talks. Amaka please i dont want to talk about this, if you dont have anything else to say please just keep mute and allow me to enjoy my money. I was getting irritated, i needed to show her. Of course i have something else to sayshe said searching her bag. She brough out her phone and plugged an ear Piece and gave it to me to listen. What is this? I asked Just listen to it yourself. I looked at the phone and there was no botton, i didnt know what to press so i gave her back her phoneAm not in the mood for your games, take your phone.i gave her back her phone. As if she read my mind, she just clicked somewhere and light miraculously appered(kai oyibo too much). I collected it and saw an icon boldly writtenPLAYi tapped it with my shaking finger. A recording started playing; kelvin hope you still remember my house? Amaka, how can i ever forget your house? Do you think i can ever forget what happened the day i visited?the recording stopped, that was the conversation we had at the eatery. I wanted to quickly delete it but i didnt know what to press. Dont bother trying to delete it kelvin, i have another copy, i think there is something else you would like to see. She collected her phone and tapped the screen, a picture appeared. I me hugging her very tight. poo, the girl had even planted a cameraman in the eatery to snap me, chai!! I don die. My first set of evidence werent convincing enought so i had to look for new ones. We will be in touchshe said and got up. She blew me an imaginary kiss and left. Now is the time for the traditional dance by the contestantthe MC announced. The contestant all came out with their traditional attire, everybody was dancing his or her cultural dance, philip was twisting his body like a snake. He was trying to dance The tiv cultural dance. All other contestant where also dancing theirs. After the traditional dance, a comedian came and trilled the crowd. The contestants where then ushered in to show theircasual wears. There all came out and showed their swag, nothing spectacular, just some wizkid kinda clothes. I wasnt feeling the show, Amaka killed my mood. After the fashion parade, there started asking them questions. The first round of questions where cheap, only chris failed his. He was asked the president of nigeria and he said Goodluck suswam. The second round of questions more tactical philip and two other guys got theirs, chris failed his. Who is the vice chancellor of uam? Maybe he was used to hearing VC and didnt know what vice chancellor meant. He looked like he had seen a ghost. Can someone tell us the answer from the crowd? The MC asked. Wait o, na children birthday we dey? I asked musa. Ehen my friend tell us, the MC pointed at me. I got up confidently and collected the mic then my brain switched off. I tried to remember but i couldnt, i stylishly kicked musa. Guy na Emmanuel kucha na, musa gave me expo. I quickly shouted the answer feeling like a bright student. Only people sitting close to me knew what happened. After the question segment, we were trilled to more performance by artists while the judges where compiling the results. After the performance, the judges gave the results to the mc. They were 8 contestant for mr.fresher and 6 for miss fresher. He called the Third and second positions for both mr and miss fresher, philips name wasnt mentioned. All the contestants remaining did equally well except chris. Dis year mr and miss fresher goes to. To.... To.... I was already urinating on my trouser. I say the winner of this pagaentry is... Is.. The crowd were shouting. No, you people are not hearing me, mr and miss fresher for this year goes to.. To...to... We are going for a short break, when we come back, we shall announce it. Clap your hands as we usher in the igede cultural dancers. Wheeeeew... That was close i thought. That awkward moment when you are angry and then someone is keeping you in suspence. I was fuming with anger because of Amaka and this silly MC is playingFrank Edohowith me. The cultural troup were dancing to the tunes of the local drums. I could see anger in the eyes of the audience, this wasnt what they paid for. E don do na, this people no know when person don tire?musa asked Oboy me sef wonder oi also voiced out my frustration. I started shouting e don do, e don do Musa joined me, the people sitting close to us also joined the train. Before i could say jack! The whole hall echoed the wordse don do, e don do We started clapping for them to leave the stage. The MC finally listened to our plea, Thank you, thank you, thank you... That was when they even added gear. I go stone this people oi voiced out my frustration. Put your hands together for the cultural troupe as they leave the stagethe MC ordered. Even though we were tired of clapping, we just had to clap so that they would leave the stage. After wasting our precious time. They finally finished their dance and left the stage. The whole hall became silent, everybody was waiting for the MC to announce the winner. Do you know why i like the igede people?the MC asked. We no wan know. how that one take concern us? MC you smoke? Those where the response from the crowd. I will tell you why i like the igede peoplehe continued. The igede people are a very hospitable group of people, and their girls are very beautiful. We don hear! Oya tell us the results. Nigerians could be very impatient, it is only in Nigeria that a policeman would beat someone for obeying traffic light. Without wasting much time, i am going to announce the winners of this pagaentry. They say ladies first so am going to announce the miss fresher before the mr.fresher. Tension was written on the faces of the contestants, there were sweating profusely. I like to invite the outgoing miss fresher to come on stage and hand over to our next miss fresher. A slim beautiful girl just catwalked to the stage. Oboy where this babe the hide since wey i never ever see her for school na?i whispered to musa philip go sabi her nahe whispered back. philip knows every girl in uam. The miss fresher for this year goes to no one but miss... He paused to take a look at the list, miss stephanie Okija. The whole crowd erupted as everyone stood to get a glimpse of the new beauty queen. I also stood up cos i couldnt get a clear view sitting down. A girl was on the floor, she was emotional. Wetin happen to that girl na, her father diei asked musa. Mumu, na the person wey win be thathe replied me. The girl was a very beautiful girl, even with the tears i could still see beauty in her face. Amaka had really done mestrong thinghow else would i not have seen this kind of beauty all this while? I dismissed her thoughts from my mind. Only God knows the number of Applications she is going to receive from guys today. The crowd were still Celebrating, some even wanted to climb the stage but they were stopped. Can i have your attention pleasethe MC tried to bring back order. The mr.fresher for this year goes to.. I was the one feeling the tension, i was drowning in my own sweat. The mr.fresher for this year goes to Philip Otame. I couldnt believe my ears, philip had just won the Mr.fresher. I jumped on the stage together with other guys to congratulate my guy. He just smilling reaveling his big teeth. Oboy you don do am, congrats mehni congratulated him. There was a hand over of crown to the new winners. The DJ started playing skelewu and everybody ran to the stage and started dancing. The guys where dancing with the miss fresher while philip was feeling himself with vivian. After all the dancing and celebration, vivian asked us to go saying the cab guy was waiting for us. We entered our cab and started going, i noticed a car was following us but ignored it. Few meters to our offcampus house, the car overtook us and parked in front of our car. Two guys came down from the car and walked to our car, brought out a gun and placed it on the drivers head. WATCHOUT FOR EPISODE 10
Posted on: Tue, 05 Aug 2014 05:34:22 +0000