FUN FACTS ABOUT THE AR-15 * The inventor of the AR-15 was Satan, though his patent has since expired. * Scientists have confirmed the deadly effects of an AR-15 by giving it to a chimpanzee who then murdered them. * Scientists agree that each year the AR-15 will grow more deadly until it kills everyone in the entire world. * Some believe that Hitler was in fact an AR-15 in a rubber mask. * In the Garden of Eden, God gave Adam and Eve access to every firearm out there except for the AR-15 which he told them not to touch because it was too evil. But then the NRA, in the guise of a serpent, told Eve that the AR-15 is really fun to shoot. So then Eve took the AR-15 and started shooting all the animals in the garden because she is one awesome chick. * The part that makes the AR-15 so extra deadly is the handle on top. The AR-15 would be used in less murders if it were more inconvenient to carry. * It was an AR-15 that told Miley Cyrus to dance like that. * Bullets that are normally harmless will kill instantly when fired out of the AR-15. * The reason AR-15s have that prominent handle on them is because the most requested feature for an assault rifle was to be able to carry it like a Hello Kitty lunch box. * If you find yourself surrounded by AR-15, know that they will fire automatically if they sense fear. * The AR-15 is easily concealable and can fit inside a matchbox. * The AR-15 is the leading cause of global warming from how its bullets shoot holes in the ozone. * A very small percentage of gun deaths are attributed to the AR-15 because it is very good at disguising itself as other guns to frame them. * What are the differences between an M16 and an AR-15? Scientists agree that it is something. * The AR-15 can be rendered harmless by giving it only a 10 round magazine as people always miss with the first ten rounds and an AR-15 takes an hour and a half to reload. * The AR-15 can shoot through schools. * In a battle between Aquaman and an AR-15, Aquaman would break down and buy it so people might think he’s more manly. * There were no shooting deaths until the invention of an AR-15. No one even considered using a gun to shoot another human being until someone saw an AR-15 and said, “I bet I could use this to kill people.” * There was an assault musket similar to the AR-15 used by the world’s most evil pirates, but it was pronounced “Arrr-15.” * The Assault Weapon ban was needed because it is well known that an AR-15 with both a pistol grip and a flash suppressor would be unstoppable by any modern military. * In Europe there is no such thing as an AR-15 and thus also no such thing as murders. Instead of being violent, people there just drink wine and smoke cigarettes all day. * If the AR-15 were banned, it’s believed all gun deaths would end because even gun murders that didn’t use the AR-15 were inspired by the evil sight of that gun. * If you are shot by an AR-15, you become one. * The AR-15 is responsible for 95% of all deaths each year. The rest of the deaths are from obesity and drone strikes.
Posted on: Tue, 22 Oct 2013 23:05:27 +0000
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