For awhile now I have dealt with depression. It was all mostly - TopicsExpress

For awhile now I have dealt with depression. It was all mostly brought on during my most favorite time of the year, Christmas! Things happened beyond mine or anyone elses control and Christmas became my least liked time of the year through association. Lying here in bed by myself alone this Christmas I felt the need to express how I feel. These are my wordd my feelings and how i feel.God bless you all & Merry Christmas Painful Praise Holding on to a senseless act I find it harder to shake Living through what is now a fact For Ive chosen to partake Why not just let it go Why not just give in Why not just learn to show Theres something new within Pain has pierced like a knife Taking my prized possesions My happiness, my kids & even my wife Ive become pains obsession I allow it to daily dwell And fill me up with sorrow Ive put myself through this living hell That most likely will be there tomorrow I try to hide it with a smile As I feel where pain has trod I feel okay for a little while But return to my facade No one can change it They cant rearrange it Only I can obtain Or choose to refrain I wish I could just let it go I wish I could just give in I wish I could learn how to show I want whats new within This eats away within my soul But no one knows that pain Its on the verge out of control Driving me insane My feelings varry My dreams fade away Its often time scary To mean what I say In confussion I continue With hope to regain Through a healing view Away from all this pain I dont want to alarm you Just know that I try To daily get through Without tears that I cry I know I am not alone For others deal with it too Theyve hidden & theyve shown The pain we all go through Without God & all my friends There would be no praise For my feelings they attend Throughout these painful days So, with the little joy in my heart I thank all those whove cared I am glad I have been a part So thankful you hav shared (This is just a glimpse of what depression feels like)

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