For years I was the ruler of mass self destruction. I destroyed everything around me while never even blinking an eye. I craved the fast lane straight thru the middle of hell it was the only road that would get me where I wanted to be. To a point of no return. My Younger years were filled with memories of the ones i loved hurting whether it be b/c of love,money,family and number of others things that would take to long to list. But b/c of those memories I told myself I would never feel that way. So from then on my prayer would be that god break me down in ways that would define me as insane. When it came time to hurt I wouldnt allow myself I was building a wall I had to have to survive. Every time I fell was never hard enough I needed to hurt a lil more to ensure that I could stand the maximum amount of pain. The pain inflicted on others was never part of my plan but it happened all the same and I was ok with b/c I got what I wanted. The coldest heart with the warmest smile so no one could ever tell The difference. 4 years ago wrapped all my inflictions into one and left scars on me that can never be erased. I got what I asked for but I also got a blessing when I realized that the game was over. Everything inside of me will one day be used for the greater good and Im proud to say I made it thru my man made hell.
Posted on: Tue, 09 Sep 2014 07:29:43 +0000
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