GROUP INPUT NEEDED: Ive wanted to ask this for some time now. Ive done what most of you warrior parents have advised never to do-negotiate with a Narc without any legal arrangement for 3 yrs now. N father and me were never married, only had a brief 2yr relationship giving me the most beautiful blessing-my son. This man slowly but surely showed his true colors after I got pregnant, but I stayed thinking my son needed his parents together. When my son turned 1 I ended the relationship beginning the game of taking it all for my sons happiness-giving him a father and a mother by his side believing my love would heal the mental imperfections of his father. My son was born with heart disease-I carry a huge amount of guilt for the hard life I see ahead. Till this day I have believed this family court system is broken. Im extremely afraid of this system. Im afraid of regretting filing for custody and making this man angry. Since day one this man has threatened to file for full custody with no mediation anytime i make him upset by saying NO to his control(first threat was when baby was still in my stomach). Ive set the schedule agreeing to 50/50 since the beginning. His father has not always taken his time for the 3yrs this arrangement has been in effect-living his life, getting married, divorced, new gfs, and moving here and there. My son goes to school near my home. I handle all medical/legal arrangements asking for his input but with this Narc never really caring as long as no one is looking I have made all decisions when it comes to medical/legal matters. Ive kind of been fooling myself-he has been controlling my life, I have no life other than patiently waiting to be mama, and hoping he doesnt take my son on his days which is not that often when I make him mad which has been frequent lately. Money is never discussed. He gets upset every time i deny giving him my sons social for tax purposes. This yr he got really upset, the verbal abuse went up a bit and he told me to find a lawyer. I feel the anger is getting worse and I think its time I stop being afraid. What kind of outcome can you warrior parents see for the scene I have set? Ive put myself in this hole letting him control the time he wants while my son has fallen in love with his father. Hes 4 and he believes his father is perfect.
Posted on: Sat, 25 Jan 2014 10:01:38 +0000
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