Happy Anniversary! Michael, No matter what the years may bring, I will always love you... What I Gave Up The Day I Got Married I was married at the age of 24. I know... besides possibly not knowing what i was doing... I was also crazy. But, dont worry, you didnt need to tell me that, I already knew. In fact, Ive heard it all from: Are you sure about this? Its a lot of responsibility. Are you pregnant or something?! How do you know hes what you want? And perhaps the most common statement of all: Dont you think youll regret not living up your single years? Followed by: You cant take back these years, youre giving them up to get married, To all those people who doubted my decision and told me I was giving it up. YOU WERE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. I gave up my heart. The moment I said I Do my love was no longer my own. I gave another imperfect human being the ability to take me higher than Ive ever been... But also the power to crush me to a million little pieces. I gave up my privacy. I went home on April 2 in someone elses car, to sleep in someone elses bed, and breath someone elses air. It would never, from that moment on, be just me anymore. It was now me and him, him and me. It was now our family, our home, our decisions. Its funny though, because the moment I became a we I realized what it really meant to be happy. I gave up my name. The name I was known for my whole life, didnt define me anymore. I would be known by his name now. I was his: to CHERISH, LOVE, HOLD, LAUGH with, CRY with, PROVIDE FOR AND TO PROTECT.. I GAVE UP my secrets: my weaknesses, my thoughts, my mistakes, the things I hid from the world, someone now would know. But, someone would also know exactly how to help me, love me, and comfort me. Someone would know me so well that they would know what I needed without me ever asking. I would lose all the hidden parts of me, and gain a perfect understanding and love from someone else. I GAVE UP my agenda. I would have to cancel plans, rearrange my schedule, go to the grocery store when the car was available, and cook dinner instead of taking a nap. And as the clock was ticking I would come to understand the reason I was given time in the first place. I WOULD GIVE UP dating different people. I no longer was available for anyone to take out. I was done meeting new people and potential spouses because I had found mine. Yes, I could have dated more, yes, theres lots of great people out there that I didnt meet, but no, theres no one else as perfect for me as Michael. And yes, I can know that even though I dated less years than most people and yes I did know that when I picked him, which was WHY I picked him. I GAVE UP awkward dinner conversations and replaced them with evenings laying in my hubbys arms, with a round belly and no make up... sporting his sweats and an oversized T-shirt, eating microwave popcorn and watching netflix and feeling more beautiful than a celebrity on the red carpet. I GAVE UP my time, my need to be right, my stubbornness, my life, my whole self. And yes I DID give up YEARS of my life that I can NEVER get back or change. BUT the difference between me and you is I dont regret one day, minute or second of those years. If anything... I wish I had began this incredible journey called marriage sooner, because nothing I have ever done, or could ever do, has filled me with as much love, happiness and peace as this. Yes it has been harder than I ever imagined it would be and I am challenged every day to be a better more selfless person that I am, but my life has taken on more meaning than I knew it could and I have become more complete than I thought was possible. And if given the choice... I would do it all over again. I would give it all up in a heartbeat.
Posted on: Wed, 02 Apr 2014 12:25:03 +0000
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