Have you ever been so overcome with grief mourning and sadness you can barely function? Everyday I struggle to smile and be me. I am lonely in rooms full of people. People not understanding how it feels to not have anyone to truly understand you or talk to u. The ones whom you trust to talk to push u away or ignore u...leaving me dead and lonely inside. I am misunderstood And bear no envy towards anything. I am happy for those who do well and does not try to destroy anyone. I was raised old school and for those who know me im not as goofy and happy anymore i look at all these big families and think wow how wonderful i dont have that. I have people tell me to move on and leave her to braise memories upon our hearts from the grave.. .i just cant accept it. I lost all faith in god and live everyday walking on eggshells so content it mocks the funny scenes in cartoons where they do everything in their power not to wake the sleeping dog without persecution.. I cry as a daily ritual to rid my emotional impurities thus said depression oppression Ive held back from posting about her but when i came across this my heart broke again and i couldnt bear not to cry since this is my day and day is my night while everyone is sleeping . quiet is my enemy Ive found out only gives me more time to think think about all that is happening to me and why when Ive always done the best i can i have been chosen to test all odds all at once . Mom if u can see me please look after me. And may u rest in peace where u are not suffering anymore. The two items I found while cleaning which began this post are below. Sorry so long but I had to let it all out before I broke down
Posted on: Mon, 29 Sep 2014 07:11:11 +0000
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