Have you ever had someone in your life who had a strange emotional impact on you, but you had no idea why? There’s a woman who I see every now and then who’s been having an odd effect on me since May. Sometimes I see her two or three times a week and other times it might be weeks before I see her again. She dropped by my office again today and I’ve been trying to figure out how to explain (and understand) the effect she has on me. There’s an odd sense that I’ve had from the first time I saw her that I already knew her — like I’d always known her and I already sensed things about her that I had no rational way of knowing. The more I get to know about her, the more I’m finding those things are true — things about her family background and emotional experiences. She’s had some of the same emotionally traumatic experience I’ve had. How did I know that? And why? There’s something about her that attracts me to her very strongly but at the same time there’s something about her that makes me feel deeply depressed — as though she’s someone whose approval I desperately need, but I somehow know I can’t penetrate her strongly hardened shell to win approval. It’s an odd feeling and I don’t think I’ve ever experienced it in this way with anyone else. I just can’t get over the feeling that we already know each other and we’ve done this weird emotional dance before. The human mind is filled with strangeness that we don’t yet understand. I’m convinced there’s some deeper psychological/emotional/metaphysical reason why I feel this way about her, but I know that a rational person would say it’s nothing and to just ignore it. I wish I could figure this out. I almost dread seeing her now, but I’m pulled toward her as well. It’s odd.
Posted on: Mon, 18 Aug 2014 19:41:41 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015