Help! I am new to organic gardening and after much preparation and planning, finally planted some kale (as well as a few other items). It has begun to grow wonderfully but caterpillars keep eating the leaves. I poured honey on the caterpillars knowing that it would attract bees, which would then sting them to death. Unfortunately, those ungrateful little bees turned on me! I bought a couple of poisonous snakes to eat the bees - which worked at first – but then the snakes got out of hand. I borrowed my neighbor’s mongoose but it’s feces attracted a pack of wild boars, which nested in the area and produce several offspring. I led a pack of wolves to the garden and they successfully slaughtered all the boars but would not leave the area afterwards. As you might have guessed, by this point, I was desperate. Luckily I found a few hawks on Craigslist. The hawks loud screams drove most of the wolves to flee or commit suicide. However, hawks are dicks and they would peck at me mercilessly or spit rocks at my window when I tried to sleep. Naturally, I flooded the garden and filled it with sharks. They dispatched of the hawks, one by one, as they would dip down to get a drink. The sharks ran out of food and I felt bad so I hired Japanese fisherman to net and spear them. This left several boatloads of hungry fishermen, which I had to feed (they do not eat shark, only use them for research purposes). All I had to offer was kale. My question: where do I buy seeds and is it too late to plant more kale?
Posted on: Tue, 27 May 2014 19:21:54 +0000
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