Hope For Today - October 24 My years in Al-Anon made me aware that I need to be careful about how I hear and interpret certain words. Consider “defects of character” and “shortcomings,” which are found in Steps Six and seven respectively. I came into Al-Anon believing I was responsible for bad things that happened and that I was “bad” or “defective.” Years of meetings have led me to think otherwise. I now view my problem areas as survival skills that served me well while I was growing up. Now they work against me, preventing me from living a serene life. Today I have Al-Anon and its tools to thrive, not just survive. I can also run into problems with the words “searching and fearless” in Step Four. To cope with the blaming and criticism in my home, I became a perfectionist. It’s all too easy for me to interpret “searching and fearless” as “perfect.” Then I end up frozen with fear, thinking I have to take the perfect inventory, which by my somewhat still twisted standards would mean inventorying every single, tiny word and action I have ever committed during my lifetime. I could drive myself insane! It helped when a member reminded me that when a grocer takes an inventory, he or she inventories what stock is on the shelves today, not what was on the shelves yesterday or the day before. That idea makes my inventory seem much more manageable. All I need to do is consider the things about myself that are bothering me and getting in the way of my growth, just for today. Thought for the Day Paying attention to how I listen, and how I interpret what I hear, can aid my recovery. “If I can get my mind off my own problems and really listen…I’ll learn a lot more today…” (Alateen – a day at a time, p. 227). From Hope For Today, p. 298. Copyright 2002, Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.
Posted on: Thu, 24 Oct 2013 17:01:36 +0000
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