How To Spot A Kenyan lol. -- Steps aside instead of resigning -- Goes to a restaurant and orders nipee kama ya ule -- He always disses a vitz but does not even own a bicycle. -- Anaanza kutafuna mifupa za kuku nyama ikiisha -- Marries a chik, loves her, proposes to her and finally pays dowry. -- They say 207 when they mean 2007 -- Turns to the conductor to signal they are about to alight a jav yet theyre seated with the driver. -- Acquires an American accent just by logging on the US Government Website. -- Sends a please call me or flashes then when you call they ask, we ni nani? -- They urinate on the streets,bushes and even on their own beds -- The calendar hasnt been flipped since Jan 2012 -- They have like 10 different cooperate calendars in there living room -- They point at stuff with their lips -- Buying Heineken at Mwauras just to look cool -- Reads your newspaper with you in the mat and gets angry when you flip over the page -- Hes in a suit and timbaland boots -- Goes to the stage, mat is 50/= goes to a bar, buys a drink worth 150/= as he waits for fair to drop to 30/= -- This is what football fans say,Sisi kama arsenali tumenunua Podolski! -- Starts with sina mengi ya kusema and talks for an hour. -- Goes to study in India, returns with an accent from America -- Borrows u a pen n they dnt return n if the return kifuniko imetafunwa -- Bargains like a student and demands services like corporate -- Looks amazingly at ol da brands n prices of booze at lifestyle then kams out with bluemoon or kibao -- Watoi lazima waende face painting weekend -- Buys 50bob to repay okoa jahazi dept only to okoa another 50 for use -- They are all political analysts and know it all -- 7 followers, 2 tweets and A PROTECTED ACCOUNT -- When surprised their first word is Ngai! -- She shaves eyebrows and draws a black line -- Introduces himself/herself by saying My names are -- Goes to a bank for a loan and the first thing he asks the banker,Nisipolipa mtafanya nini? -- Thinks a pavement is an unused car lane haha...crazy -- Goes to a bar healthy walks out blind -- Hes owed you money for soo long that you forgot and actually borrowed some from him -- Eats boiled eggs outside a club after a rave -- Buys mineral water once and re- uses the bottle with tap water for 2 months -- Anaeka collection ya chupa empty za mzinga kwa keja. -- They have empty perfume/ cologne bottles arranged kwa curtain box ya bedroom.. -- Enters swimming pool,pees in swimming pool. -- They fear meeting a police at night than a robber! -- Tea and mandazi for lunch then tootpick in mouth all afternoon.. -- The guy peeling the stickers off his beer bottle. -- Spots a celeb then pretends in nthin big then floss wakifika home -- The guy carrying an Uchumi and a Tuskys plastic bag. Coz bread is cheaper in Tuskys and soaps cheaper in Uchumi You call them to say Happy Birthday they reply Thanks! You too! Kenyan:Mko na rice na Beef? Waiter:Ndio Kenyan:Pilau? Waiter:Ndio Kenyan:Kuku/Chips ni ngapi? Waiter: 350 Kenyan:Haya Nilete Githeri -- Makes a phone call holding the call end button. -- Always refer to people as you guys -- Bamburi cement T-shirt is her night dress. -- We walk around the office trying to kill time a few minutes before 5pm. -- On their way to msa,they must have a meal at mtito andei even at 3am. -- 15 commuters will scrum to get into an empty 29 seater matatu. -- Where a blind beggar rejects a fake note. --Will hurry to an accident scene to check whether victims have wallets IF THIS IS NOT SO TRUE I DO!!!! Hahaha
Posted on: Mon, 10 Mar 2014 13:49:48 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015