How to Forget Someone You Really Hate, Find Out In Easy 5 Ways Not being able to get something that bothers you out of your mind can be very annoying! It can be doubly annoying if that something is thoughts about someone you hate. Wouldn’t it be better if you could forget that person, and so free yourself from these thoughts? #1 Lose the Hate: To forget someone you really hate requires taking the emotion out of the equation. Hate is a strong emotion and when focus is put on it the mind believes and accepts it as real, and the more real it feels the more time you will find yourself focusing on it. Emotions are created by the thoughts we have, but thoughts are not necessarily facts: we choose which thoughts we accept as being true. Be mindful of the negative thoughts you have for that person, and when you become aware of them entering your mind, allow them to pass, without engaging with them. #2 Question Your Behavior: Why do you hate the person? Have they really done something so abhorrent that it entitles you to bestow such a strong emotion on them? Or, is it possible that the hate is more a result of where you are in your world? Are you a happy person, easy going and laid back, or are you quick-tempered, easily annoyed, and always ready for a fight? If the latter sounds like you, then maybe the problem is more about your behavior, beliefs and interpretations to what happens around you, and less about the other person. #3 Find Closure: Resolve to accept what has passed: you can’t change the past, and negative emotions—such as hate—damage the future. Decide to forgive them, and also forgive yourself for holding negative thoughts about another person. Place yourself in their shoes and consider how things could look from their perspective. In their shoes, would you agree that they should have such a strong emotion attributed to them? Also, put yourself in the position of an impartial observer; someone who doesn’t know either of you. #4 Reminders of the Person: Do you have any reminders of this person? Photos, clothes, etc that can act as a stimulus to thoughts being created about the person. Maybe its worth removing them from sight, either putting into storage or disposing of them entirely. If there are places that the person frequents, consider going or being somewhere else if that doesn’t have a detrimental effect on you. This might not be possible if you work with them, for example, but often the anger and hate we feel for a person can draw us to places we think they might be. #5 Refocus Your Energy: Aim to get on with and progress in your life. Use all the energy wasted on hate to pursue new interests, career progression at work, and people you care for and enjoy spending time with. Remind yourself that you are wasting time and energy hating that person—time and energy that could be put to positive use, focused on people you think are better deserving of it. “That’s the best revenge of all: happiness.” great don soley
Posted on: Tue, 23 Jul 2013 11:00:13 +0000
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