I LOVE Mustard. As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection: a - TopicsExpress



          

I LOVE Mustard. As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection: a thi ck slab of ham on a fresh bun with crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard. The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands , but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side. Here, hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich, she said. I had him balanced betw een my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers... I love mustard. I had no napkin. I licked it off. It was not mustard. No man ever put a baby down faster. It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding out. Wit h a washcloth in each hand, I did the sort of routine sh oeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue. Later, after she stopped crying from laughing so hard, my wife said, Now you know why they call that fancy mustard Poupon!
Posted on: Sun, 02 Nov 2014 22:51:31 +0000

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