I also posted this on A POST-OP & A DOC, but some of you guys dont visit there very often (or dont know about it) so Im posting it here AND inviting you to LIKE our page: Facebook/apostopandadoc * * * THERE WILL ALWAYS BE SOMETHING BETTER. Post-Op Here: I took my car (Blanca) to the dealership this morning for her annual physical and, as I was rattling off to the service manager, the little things that needed attention (including some rattles), it occurred to me that my car is not very fancy. As a matter of fact, shes downright plain -- starting with the paint color (white) and ending with the grey cloth seats! HOWEVER, she is extremely reliable and gets the job done -- albeit, in a rough sorta way (because she keeps me pretty connected to the road (bbbbbbbbbbump.) NOW: Hannahs friend just purchased a car that is the same year as mine (2010) with about the same mileage…I wont namedrop, because thats not the point of this post. Heres why Im telling you this: When I visited her car, I noticed all of Fionas fun bells and whistles (Fiona is the cars name). She has a gorgeous instrumentation panel with my favorite blue lights, an AMAZING stereo system, and a host of other perks that would put my car to shame…and they are equally matched in terms of their value (just a hair-above a manual egg-beater, but pretty far below a Kitchen-Aid stand mixer). BOY…For a couple of days there (!!!) I was feeling pretty down [not the best use of my emotional energy, I assure you]. Then, I visited the dealership this morning and thats when it hit me: In life, there will ALWAYS be something better and someone ELSE will ALWAYS have it. So…what am I going to do about that? Devalue what I have because someone else has something better? This would be easy for me to do, considering the fact that it was my modus operandi for years and years and years, so Im pretty at it. In other words: Yes…that is precisely what I was setting myself up to do! In other words, on top of being disappointed in the performance level of my car..I was now ready to devalue her, too! I was going to say that even though shes doing what shes supposed to do…shes not good enough. HMMMM…then it remembered I bought my car for practical purposes, because I needed something affordable, reliable and economical. Guess what? In Blanca, I got all of those things -- but no more. Thats reality. I got my moneys worth. I got what I said I wanted. So, if thats what I said I WANTED, is it reasonable for me to want to change horsepower midstream? Is it reasonable for me to WISH Blanca was somehow better than she is? You tell me: Is it REASONABLE to change horsepower midstream in your weight loss journey, where you somehow decide that the 100 pounds you lost in 6 months just isnt good enough, and you wish youd lost 150? Okay, before you point out that these concepts are not perfectly matched, I encourage you to see the big picture: Whether its a car or surgery or your weight loss program: Ask yourself: Are you GRATEFUL for what you have? Is what you have getting the job done? If what you have doesnt work as it was supposed to, then do you need to change that thing? if its a car -- and you can afford more -- upgrade. If its your body, and you have shrinkles that need reconstructive surgery (and you can afford it) upgrade. If you want to build more muscle and you can make time in your schedule to do what it takes to build that muscle…upgrade. If, however, upgrading isnt possible or practical…are you using and fully appreciating what you do have? I guess what Im saying is, there will ALWAYS be something better…someone thinner…someone fitter…someone more athletic…someone wealthier…someone with a better car…someone with a better job…someone or something that is more than you are. Well…in most cases, I think you have more power than you think to change that. Does that mean you are LESS because there is MORE out there? I think not. Does that mean you can be MORE? Maybe. Maybe not. Does that mean you should appreciate (have gratitude) for progress youve made (10 pounds or 100)? Absolutely, yes. The moral of this story is, if we focus on what someone has that we dont, how can we ever believe were good enough? Remember, I can ask this, because I spent 40 years perfecting the art of feeling less-than; I made sure I was always less-than because I didnt do what I needed to do to believe I was enough…I CHOSE to believe I couldnt be more. Hows your car looking to you these days? How about your body and person? On the journey of recovery, the goal is to keep moving -- even if youre *driving a jalopy* for now (even if you are still obese and struggling to lose weight, or are swimming in shrinkles) -- Are you moving or are you complaining that what you have wont get the job done, cant be changed, and wont ever be good enough? I cant speak for you, but I kinda think Im Blanca in person form. Im reliable -- not the best, not the worst, but quite good -- I can always work to be better (because, someday, you know…Im gonna have to trade her in on a new model.) BUT: In order to be better -- not the best, but better -- Im going to always need to work at it. In the meantime, my job is remember that Im not less-than…Im MORE THAN I ever was.
Posted on: Thu, 20 Mar 2014 18:45:48 +0000