I am so thankful for my sweetheart, he reminds me that all is really and truly perfect and okay, for it is Gods plan that I am living and I do know that Jesus is with me each and every step of the way! So much has happened in such a small amount of time, less than a month ago my world was as normal as I thought it could be. My biggest challenge was really to get my health good and just living each day as it was even though I wasnt doing much but resting when I needed (which ended up being a lot of time), yet I felt very comfortable and at peace. In the time that I decided to come to be with my children, I have watched miracles happen, my apartment is being loved and cared for by a wonderful woman, I am so grateful for her, for this is a sanctuary that has been more of a home for me than any other that I have ever lived. My trip was amazing and safe, other than the cargo carrier beginning to come apart, but then my daughter in-laws father rescued me, he drove a couple of a hundred miles to get the carrier and I followed him home. I arrived and found out that my mom was put in a hospital in somewhat critical condition and she too is a miracle, her surgery went wonderfully well and she is recovering at her home. My daughter had two brand new puppies, but they both developed parvo, one didnt make it, Smoke died within moments after we left her for medical treatment. We picked the puppy up, my daughters heart was broken, and she and I bathed little smoke, anointed her and placed her on an alter. The children and Shaun J returned to find her already passed, this was also heartbreaking. Before getting the new puppy, we had to clean everything with Clorox, since I cant smell, I was not getting any warning signs that I was being poisoned by the chlorine. For my already sensitive body, this has taken its own toll on me, my lungs are still working at coming back to a peaceful state as the fatigue is also taking its toll, I know that a lot of my energy is going to healing. I dont have my spiritual family with me now, I miss them all so very much! I am in a vortex of different energies, Colorado seems to have a very earthy energy while Sarasota has such a heavenly energy. I will seek the food for my spirit here, but I miss being understood ... and that sounds very much like ego to me, however, it is what it is for now. My doctor sent to my place of employment that I am not healthy enough to return to work, not in any capacity ~ I have lost my job now, Comcast sent me a letter letting me know that they needed to do this however I can re-apply in the future. While all of this is happening the short term disability pay I was receiving also stopped because they need to have a third party look to see if my doctor is correct in his findings, this third party will never see or speak to me, they will read his notes. I feel this is a bit crazy. It was a shock to see NOTHING deposited into my bank account yesterday. The point of this post is to really allow myself to absorb and see what my month has been like since I woke up in tears this morning. The sun comes up at about 5am here so it is a very early rise each day. I completely feel like I have broke down. I shall meet this challenge and all set before me, I must always remember who is guiding me and though my mind feels like darkness has fallen upon it, my heart feels broken for the people that I miss as my heath was set back due to the chlorine, I know that this is just what it is ~ and it too shall pass. I am truly a very blessed person, I have asked for years for God to create a wonderful me, a wonderful soul so that I can be of use here, but to one day vibe so high that I can sit on his lap in Heaven. I seek to soar to the light of my creator. This is a temporary challenge for me, but I honor my tears, I honor the feelings that I am going through. Peace and Grace will be mine as I achieve each level of growth with the beautiful love of God ~ Pray for me please, I ask this because I feel that I need you
Posted on: Sat, 26 Jul 2014 13:19:51 +0000
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